Next Next Gen Console Wars

[00:00:00] Gaming Podcast, If you are new and joining us. We are three brothers who grew up together gaming and we get together and talk about gaming. We may also talk about TV movies.

[00:00:50] Another new nerdy geeky stuff to nothing is off the table here. I am your host, Take it easy channel with me, The other two trolls, Last in eight here and Dandoff the wise. And today you're

[00:01:05] in first silly one. You are in first silly one. So if you have come to get real intellectual type discussions on the latest in the industry. Unfortunately that's not what we do here.

[00:01:17] Just kidding. I mean, we do some of that. I swear. I swear we do. Today though, we will be unveiling our new Elder Trolls design game consoles. Okay. Now, um, this came about because our friends over

[00:01:34] at the gaming together podcast recently did their two year special. And we kind of did a console fantasy draft where we created our own consoles. But it was focused on the list of exclusives. We did a

[00:01:46] snake draft like a fantasy draft and we drafted franchises that we would have exclusively on our console. It was hilarious. It was very funny. Go check it out, game me together. I listened to it

[00:01:59] and I couldn't stop laughing. Like a Pam came in and she was like, what the hell are you laughing at? Like, I was just this show we were on man. It's funny. It was just a shit show just funny.

[00:02:09] Oh man. But ours is going to focus more on the console itself rather than the list of exclusives. So it's kind of an expansion of that. But yeah, what's going on? It is a Saturday.

[00:02:21] Afternoon and I'm feeling first ski ready to get into this. Well, speaking of first ski guys, I started an only fancy count. Now get this. Excuse me where I play games naked. And if you don't

[00:02:38] need live when I'm streaming, I'll pay in the camera down and you can see my junk all mangled and mashed up and sweaty. Like giving sweaty mashed up junk. And you didn't run this ball.

[00:02:53] No, it's trying to make money for the podcast unbelievable. And if you donate more, I'll lift my gut out of the way and you get a better view of my sweaty junk. No, say, I'm like,

[00:03:07] ain't nobody want to see that. No, I don't think so. I thought I thought I was getting some pretty good traction. In the first couple of weeks, because I was starting getting emails from the

[00:03:18] only fans support. And the header was like, overwhelming traffic, you know, like, I thought I was done. I thought I was doing a really good job and my subs, you know, that one got me excited. But get this it was overwhelmingly negative. It was actually, can't imagine why

[00:03:38] it's a completely different way. People actually asking how they can donate to make me stop my only fans channel. They literally wanted to pay me to stop creating content on only fans, they're like, we have never received so many things happen for money back for refund requests.

[00:03:58] Has that ever happened before? I don't know, but wow, they offered to sub to an elder Charles Patreon. If it was available just to keep me from creating content on only fans. That cut

[00:04:10] deep man. Just stop. What your clothes on and stop? Oh, man. But what I was thinking, where's the platform for us disgusting freaks? I believe it's called the circus. Ugly fans. It travels around to town to town. Ugly fans, we should start that.

[00:04:34] We just, you'd have far better luck on ugly fans. Ugly fans. I never even actually googled that. Is that a thing? It's probably a thing. I hope not. It's probably a thing. Like I've said before, there's an astra every seat to be for every flower. There's an astra

[00:04:51] every camera or a cat. Oh, no. That's what's been going on with me guys. What about you? Wow, that was a failed attempt, I guess. Nothing going on here just yeah. I actually went on

[00:05:10] did a thing with Aaron and Tommy from the SuperPod saga. SuperPod saga.com. We did a YuGi-O. I'd never played YuGi-O before. They asked me to go on me and Dave who has never played YuGi-O and actually expressed his hatred for YuGi-O as a magic the gathering play.

[00:05:30] So we tried to play against each other without knowing the rules at all while Aaron and Red from Night of the Living podcast tried to coach us and like it was just a shit show. I did no idea

[00:05:45] what was happening. Okay, some of them won the first game. There's so many words on every card. I was just like man, this is too much for me to like and we skipped the tutorial completely. Like we didn't even do this

[00:05:57] Mario. We literally started and I'm like okay, what am I doing? It was ridiculous and I I stomped him in the first game and then I got stomped every game after that because I don't know that deck

[00:06:10] that he was playing it was almost like a secret deck. You know, okay, yeah, because he had a bunch of spells that were active but I couldn't see them and he could activate them at any point like during my attack.

[00:06:23] So he had this every time and like I would go to a attack him and he would just destroy my fucking minion. I was like dude what the hell? And like I didn't have any cool spells or anything like that.

[00:06:33] Like my deck was horrible and he still created your deck and just choose from a pre- just like pre-mates. Okay, yeah, there's like pre-mate decks like that. I had another one that I didn't

[00:06:42] try because I used the same one every we used the same one every match either that was just a bad deck a matchup against that one or the deck is just poor and generally it was not very good. Anyway,

[00:06:54] check it out if you're so inclined it's superpod-sugget.com. I will just this UGO card game. UGO's old. Yeah, it's old. Well, no, I know like the the actual cards are old but has there been like a

[00:07:10] game around for a while? What do you mean that's always been a card game? Yeah, we talking about wasn't it a card game in the anime and shit? No, no. I mean like a video game

[00:07:21] like were you playing like a video game or like actual cards like yeah. Yeah, it's like a trading card game. Okay, yeah, well how old is that? Well the actual app. I have no idea. Yes. I used to have UGO cards

[00:07:33] because I remember really collecting them at the same time as I had Pokemon cards back in the day when I was a kid and I was like, he's don't seem as cool. I didn't like the I found that art was a bit weird. I think it was UGO

[00:07:45] because you don't know what UGO was in Pokemon. Oh, it's brand new. What do you mean it's brand new? UGO Master do it. The amount January 2022. For consoles on PC.

[00:07:55] It's gonna say because I have heard nobody playing this even like I've been one. No, there's been a UGO card game for longer than that. This is maybe like the new like oh, this is maybe what else was there? There was Pokemon?

[00:08:08] UGO? Am I forgetting one? There was one more that was Cimum? Did youmon? Yeah. That was a show though. That wasn't a card game, right? Did you monster not a card game? No. So you mean you know I remember being like the some of the art was cool

[00:08:20] and I remember liking the cards but it's all dragons. It's all dragons. Yeah, it's very flashy and like and they like I had to like combine you combine monsters to create a master summon that like okay

[00:08:35] Is this really strong guy? Yeah, because I was watching it's like oh I got his right leg. I got it. It's left leg or something It was like what the fuck? Oh really? I don't know. I have no idea. I had no idea what I was playing

[00:08:44] I was just putting cards down because they were highlighters like oh I can play this so I'll put it down and sometimes it worked out sometimes it didn't

[00:08:53] But most of the time it did not because he kept destroying my giant guys like I would create this huge summon at a two guys

[00:09:00] And you can only play one guy per turn so it's like there's a few turns of setup and then I get this big massive Dude. I'm like yes, the like secret spell x y z summon the z's or some shit summon

[00:09:13] And and he just died to like a secret. He just is just right And I know I have no cards in my hand like what that all my

[00:09:22] Yeah, I don't know I was weird but I might try play in some more on the yeah against the AI or something So yeah that goes it's supposed to be Fantastic interesting But the thing is like we're very late in there

[00:09:37] In the in the game's life so it's like it's like joining her stone now like the cards are so powerful It's just like what am I doing? There's so much stuff if there's too much to read on the card

[00:09:48] It's a lot to read on the card like I'm sitting there Like this much text and then the picture yeah, yeah, no the I was the card. Yeah I did actually scroll on the street to read all the cards no, it's a thing. It's out one

[00:10:04] For nice my parents like Aaron's like what's that card? Do yeah scroll down Okay, keep scrolling Dude how much taxes on this fucking card do shit man. Yeah, it was bad. Wow Anyway It comes with like two cards that they print like a

[00:10:22] A like a secondary card just with a description. Yeah, it's like a full day like a pressure Wow, that would be like ridiculous it's like click on it scroll on gore man But yeah other than that Nothing really happening Yeah, what are you got going on?

[00:10:47] You know, just kind of the daily grind in the studio makes an audio recording audio trying to get Have a project that I really need to get out by summer that I'm working on

[00:10:58] Like your personal one or someone no you're doing off someone else so I just cuz I got I got it done But it's shaping out pretty well I had to basically There's some changes that I had to make to it and I started sniffing out a nice

[00:11:13] A new direction for the track And it's like the right direction. It's weird man. You do this stuff. You think just when you think you know Is it you're doing direction? No, I wish you wish

[00:11:28] Just when you think you know what you're doing the more they say the more you learn the less you know right and it's like

[00:11:34] Case in point the other day. I kind of had like a breakthrough with it, but hopefully we'll get it done by summer and that's kind of what I'm working toward as well as I just kind of started I guess

[00:11:46] I just started mixing and mastering for Friday night game cast Nick and Will which has been extraordinarily fun even like the first Two weeks of it just cuz I just get to listen to them more regularly At least the fire sides And it's been a blast and

[00:12:05] I got to say Nick if you're listening the music you use for your episodes is just killer just all these bang or tracks He puts in for his music breaks and stuff and I'm just like listening making the mix and like yeah, yeah, he's always

[00:12:18] Really all from the games I think that's generally what he tries to do But I don't know for sure every time it might not be 100% of the time but I think so and a lot of them are great

[00:12:35] So it's been fun. I've been having a lot of fun just doing kind of this creative stuff podcasting you know making music There you go. Thanks, Dan Dolf. Nice standoff services for mastering your

[00:12:49] Yeah, man your audio whoever's listening if you got a podcast and you're uh you're not sure about you know how to do all that stuff How to make it sound decent after the fact Tell me message we'll talk we'll talk oh little consult consultation

[00:13:05] Okay, before I move on I have a story for you guys Me and my friends went to go see the Lord of the Rings in concert the return of the king And we thought we'd make a night of it. We went to dinner before the show

[00:13:21] And it was probably the most bewildering restaurant experience I've had in a long time so check this out We're running around before the show We're running on before the show. We're trying to find a spot to eat

[00:13:34] Most places are at least an hour wait, but we finally find a place that wasn't completely packed Yeah, it was crazy because the show was going down the road. We're right around the venue

[00:13:43] We finally walk into this place the names of everyone involved will remain nameless as well as the restaurant But we finally find this place. We go in the owner seems like a totally normal dude and Abby goes in and he's like

[00:13:57] She says we're looking for place to eat we've got a show to see it seven 30. He says okay. Yeah come on. Well You know what will let you sit down. You got a nice smile. Let you sit down. We're like okay cool. Yeah, that's cute great

[00:14:07] So we've got to seat so murder start Horrible 6 p.m. Plenty of time to order and eat but we look around and like nobody has food the entire time we're sitting there And I think we were sitting there for like 25 minutes before we finally took our order

[00:14:25] And Nate's getting like worked up stressed out Evan doesn't want to be late because it's his first orchestral show So he was like man, I don't want to miss it and he's a huge fan of the ring

[00:14:36] So and I didn't want to be late because we were late for the two towers in March 2020. We walked in like 15 minutes late right

[00:14:42] And as it turns out you don't want to be late for a concert at TD place because they won't even see you if you enter Past the start time of the event. You have to wait until intermission to find your seats if you walk in late

[00:14:55] Yeah, if you're late you're a fucking idiot. I'm like Well say 7 or 7 pit 15 is our cutoff time and then we'll delta and Nate's like Getting more and more tens this time goes on and he's like looking around. He's like

[00:15:07] Dan nobody has food here man. Let's just go get some food somewhere else and like Relax Relax you're stressing everyone out He's gonna fucking murder all you people in feed Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, they're just like cooking everyone back All right

[00:15:30] 25 minutes of increasing tension okay, so we're waiting for the food the owner comes out Finally it makes an announcement And he goes everybody and we're like oh shit

[00:15:41] He goes by kitchen staff did a show up. I got one chef in the back and I'm doing my best but I understand if you want to leave If you stay it's gonna be take a little longer to get your food that would be great

[00:15:49] But if you want to get out if you want to leave that's funny if you go places to be really like holy shit And this Nate that sends Nate over the top because he's already

[00:15:56] well stressed out and I was like man relax. We might still get our food So eventually the owner comes to our table and he's swearing like a fucking sailor in front of like the entire restaurant He's just he's absolutely manic and he comes over to our table

[00:16:11] We thought maybe because maybe he's on coke Because I know people who have been in the restaurant business and apparently there's a lot of coke being done to just To just get you through these longass Yeah, so I think it comes over

[00:16:24] It's like sorry guys. I don't know what to tell you my cooks didn't fucking show up this fucking bullshit man And he's just like swearing and we're like oh, yo, it's fine like we were late ever lags

[00:16:33] We understand it's not your fault whatever you leave still come back storing again Trying to make conversation you what do you want me to say? What do you want to say? I type fucked up people leaving

[00:16:41] I don't care so I'd be about the money look at my ratings bro look at my ratings pulls out his phone shows us his ratings on Google 4.8 is like my food is fucking good, man. It's not about the money. It's not about the money. I don't even care

[00:16:54] Yeah, I scared that You're gonna give him a well-yelp review Give him a one-star review That would fucking suck. I would murder my kitchen staff. They're fucking done

[00:17:09] Yeah, yeah, oh yeah, I mean he was understandably very angry, but he was not doing a good job at handling it Publicly as an owner of a restaurant and the this poor waitress will call her Jane

[00:17:22] Who is making her round she comes over to she's helping us out. She's asking the kitchen staff when the food is gonna be ready for us So we can leave you know that kind of stuff really nice

[00:17:29] And she comes up to him while he's talking to us and she's like oh, we need some ice and he's like So go get the fucking ice it's in the fridge in the back on the fridge fuck and he's like swearing at her and like abusing her verbally

[00:17:40] This one family comes in at one point with two little girls And he's like telling them at the doorway. Yeah, so I'm a cook-suit of fucking showups been a shitty night so far Your muffs and he like you know swearing it for these little girls and Nate's like

[00:17:53] There's freaking kids here man relax And eventually comes back to us later and we're he's like holding his hand with his jacket on And we're like what's going on here? He's like I fucked up my hand my my fucking bone is sticking up my hand

[00:18:05] I punched that bridge in the back. We're like And he offers us free drinks and Cuz we're pressed for time as it is and he's like again, we'll color Jane Jane You get this table some free lights

[00:18:19] And we're like three lights what the fuck is free lights get up Shit it suck the shitty beer Get the fucking bug liva fucking bitches Get the fucking bug liva any Yeah, hangover. Yeah Anyway get this okay. This was this was Super bizarre I can't even believe this

[00:18:48] But he was like bizarre yeah certainly is yeah, well, imagine Nate and I are just sitting there like Like she was bleeding his actual phone stick and there was just blood like was not everywhere And you're like oh, what's going on man?

[00:19:02] Should have been all over your fucking pain into our free lights Like now thanks man, no, thanks But so the best beers Bro

[00:19:12] So I couldn't believe this but Nate and Abby and Evan are trying to calm this guy down. You know it's okay we understand it and Nate and I are just like Like we could we couldn't even say anything we were just like speechless I've done but

[00:19:24] He tells us he's like oh go get this get this okay, so he's still at our table talking to us It's holding his bloody hands. Why do you love you guys so much

[00:19:33] Well get to that so I went on it he's like he's like I went on a date earlier, okay? Three or four o'clock this afternoon guess what she's still here she's serving drinks for me

[00:19:42] Bro, I don't even know this girl I had to ask her for help. That's the situation. I was like Is it James? Well, it's probably not even legal because she probably doesn't have a license You know what I mean like

[00:19:51] He just asked this random girl to help serve him sort of drinks for that strength because he doesn't have any help there Like that's brutal and I was like I don't believe this and I took a couple behind us to see on couple

[00:20:01] I was like it's the food even worth the wait and they're like it's really good and He's been here before and this doesn't usually happen and I was like okay And they were like you seem to be his favorite table he only comes talk to you

[00:20:15] I was like he hasn't been talking to anybody else. They're like no He's going on He's from the elder trolls gaming pot. Yeah, maybe So after all this insanity intention and us being stressed and pressed for time he makes his final exit

[00:20:31] Okay, after like several breatheres. He's walked outside with his jacket on but he finally leaves He slams his hand against like the glass partition that separates the entryway to the rest of the restaurant and it's just like Boom and everyone's like

[00:20:46] And he just like walks out like storms out it was like an episode of kitchen nightmares You know what yeah, it's gonna say I mean I was like where is Gordon Ramsay here where are the cameras

[00:20:58] But he finally you know the food finally comes and he tells us the drinks and the food is on us which was nice I felt bad because of he has a shitty night, you know

[00:21:07] But man we jumped on the food like animals because we're just starving too. We're stressed pressed for times starving and I was Just scarfing the food down. I was made to it was great Which is like

[00:21:23] Probably this I don't know I guess the reward right for sticking it out but it was really good and we finished all But we made the concert by like two minutes. It was like 720 and we were scanning our tickets

[00:21:35] And this show started at 730 so they're like you're lucky any later We wouldn't have been able to let you in But the show was great honestly anybody listening who's a Lord of the Rings fan go and if Lord of the Rings concert is near you go see it

[00:21:46] Like it's it's it's a spectacle and it just has to be Experience it's really really sick It took a P like 20 minutes in and they didn't let me in Nate back in till intermission So that was cool. So don't leave your seat also

[00:21:59] Just because you have to take a piss have a piss just get it out. What's it? How long were you waiting? Was a good like 25 half an hour We were standing on the back like under the railings like at the you know the drapes

[00:22:12] And there's a freaking pregnant lady behind me standing there. She obviously had to pee mid show She can't control that she's pregnant and she's just standing there with her huge baby Here, huge belly Waiting to bring go in and I'm like you guys are like that's a stupid

[00:22:25] Policy I understand being late to the show But when you're on time and you just have to pee and come back That's idiotic when you're paying a hundred plus dollars for a ticket And this is coming from the classical music musician who's like

[00:22:37] Observed every rule of respect in the book. I know okay how it works So if you were on stage conducting or playing the trombone or two, but and people are up and down up and down up and down That wouldn't bother you

[00:22:51] No, that's too big of an excuse me. You have to expect this me right off It's the code of my tutor. I throw down my tuba. I'd like get the fuck Two and wait

[00:23:01] Hey, I thought you were the drum bone champ you playing the tuba tuba a trombone same shit The rusty drum bone. I hear you play it. Well, I am a master at the rest Yeah, go check that short out on YouTube. He's really good

[00:23:18] But no the venue was too big you can't expect everybody just be able to sit down like there's there's Concession stands people are drinking at the same time It was a small auditorium like a recital hall. Yes, it annoys me

[00:23:28] It's done and it's happened all the time. I'm like oh, they fuck it's too small for you to notice everybody moving breathing blinking Wow, but this was like a big place You're not gonna you're up conducting your focusing there's an whole orchestra playing nobody's gonna hear that stuff

[00:23:40] It's just the people around you that you're kind of annoying for a split second But when you got a piss you got a piss or shit your pants What's worse? Anyway, it was an extremely chaotic night

[00:23:51] But the concert and the good food was a reward anyway. I just had to tell it's the right because it was the most insane thing like I couldn't I couldn't believe you was what was happening so anyway

[00:24:01] Yeah, man people don't want to show up for work all the time everywhere I'm sure that happens a lot actually Yeah, especially if you're last night. I hear too. Yeah, and that's crazy bad night for a dad

[00:24:11] And I think he said four people didn't show up he had four cooks that were supposed to come in

[00:24:15] All people didn't show up for it. And I never had he went to go check the cook like who was in the back and he's apparently just like a some old man Like just a little old man shuffling around cooking it like holy shit

[00:24:29] But he made a hell of a dish and of course that can't really say what they were the restaurant because they You know, I wouldn't want to do that. You don't want to do a dog's them. Yeah, yeah, exactly 200 listeners Anyway, wow

[00:24:43] Wow, that was a that's crazy. That is just Wow, I mean I guess that's a good It's a good spot to uh to just just get on with this and yeah and put it into the game time All right

[00:25:12] Welcome to game time where we discuss what we're playing and some gaming news Um Guys, I got uh You already know this but I did get a new tech toy listeners You know how we preach eye pleasure

[00:25:29] Yeah eye pleasure the viewing experience the viewing experience. I got a new monitor for my PC I got the alien where 34 inch ultra wide QD OLED Monitor Right right But it's it's a refurb. I got it refurbished for almost 500 dollars cheaper than

[00:25:53] That's crazy that's actually a huge usually refurbished with like $450 $450 off and it came with a one-year warranty so I'm like fuck yeah I'll do this. I'm gonna try it Hmm and it is awesome. It's the same OLED panel as my TV the QD OLED

[00:26:10] And if I didn't know it was refurb. I like I would have thought it was brand new because like the box and the way they packaged it was really good Things were like sealed inside the box still

[00:26:20] So I don't know if it was like an open box or what happened, but what's the brand? What is it Sony? What is it Alienware? Dell Ooh Dell Alienware. What could possibly happen

[00:26:32] Who knows maybe the display got dimni swapped out the display and fucking put it back together and sent it out Yeah, who knows. I don't know. It's really good though. It's a cracked it's just like a cracked base

[00:26:43] Yeah, it could be kind of a swap the base yeah, we had a friend that worked for Best Buy and he said like the stuff that comes in and the stuff for Overbox and refer but it's like literally sometimes it's there's absolutely nothing wrong with it

[00:26:57] And like people just don't like The way I don't know like there might be a little crack and like the bezel or something Tiny scratch or something a scratch and then they just okay, and they put it back out refer because they

[00:27:09] Replace the bezel and it's perfectly fine Yeah, well must be with case cuz like it's Perfect. It's perfect. The ultra wide is a bit strange though at first I don't know if you've ever played on an ultra wide or used an ultra wide

[00:27:21] Because it's smaller from top to bottom Right, yes, but it's just like What it's so wide and Because the same resolution top to bottom two as my old monitor right it's just smaller and size so it's a bit

[00:27:35] Drink this is a bit smaller that way but giant this way and the widenist though is really nice for immersion like we talk about immersion boys and girls This is immersive. That's one of my favorite things about gaming. Is it curved? Did you say that? I remember

[00:27:50] Yeah, it's curved. It's a 34 inch wide ultra wide curved and It's just the the wider field of view in front of you is just It makes you feel like that give you more advantage this wider view in

[00:28:07] Apex legends and stuff. I don't think so because the field of view is set. I don't know how that works The setting of the field of view in game is Is set but illusion

[00:28:21] I don't know it's just the in game camera lens would yes, adjust it rather than the the actual Yeah, but no two inches of vision you're not no. I don't think so but Well, maybe you

[00:28:38] Do you? I don't know that's a good question. You need to figure out my answer Bending my mind right now because the field of view setting in game is set Which is what you see in game

[00:28:47] But if your monitor is that why the degrees of what you see yeah But if your resolution is wider that degree can still be the same degree It'll be wider no that the degree would change because it's wider widening the view is changing the viewing angle Anybody knows

[00:29:13] Yeah, that's a mind-bender not sure how that works. I'll have to look that up In in conclusion results it I played apex with it. I feel like I'm in the game more, you know what I mean? And also it's very responsive like the the input

[00:29:31] It's so fast like the the response time is insane I didn't think I'd notice it that much but I don't know it says Point four milliseconds in the specs and I think ratings tested it. I like 1.4 Mill of seconds or something like that

[00:29:45] So 1.4 milliseconds wow it's fucking fast. Oh, yeah destiny 2 looks great been playing that it looks really nice Bright it gets bright even hearts don't get it's just just just the gold and the flashing and the you know in

[00:30:00] Heartstone and it's just I know what you mean by that now Yeah, I know well acquainted oh, it is I know yeah, let's talk about destiny too can we because I've been playing it to Yeah, I don't like this strand business like we were playing oh you will

[00:30:17] What do you mean I will I know what it is we'd played the same? I played longer now, but oh you can longer now you can unlock different Abilities for the strength so you don't need to use the grapple hook you don't need to do all that shit

[00:30:32] You can buy new Abilities to put it no slots Yeah, because I was not impressed they forced you to like they forced you to use the strand during these the the campaign missions and I'm like

[00:30:44] I don't even want to use it. I want to use my normal abilities. I hate this shit like I couldn't kill Like I want my grenades. I don't want the stupid grapple hook. Yeah, you can change that after

[00:30:54] Because I have a as a warlock anywhere that we were grappling to I could just double jump and like Float up there like I didn't need to use the grapple

[00:31:02] I wanted my grenades so it was kind of annoying, but yeah other not it's fun. It's been good. What's this the expansion that came out? What's the call again light fall light fall? Yes, it's destiny to light fall expansion just came out

[00:31:15] a couple weeks ago a couple of weeks ago we beat the campaign it was quite short Like maybe 10 missions or something wasn't much although that doesn't shock me now because I mean a lot of

[00:31:26] Shits online especially I feel like destiny is more targeted for that right I think destiny is targeted for like Grinding and raids and stuff so the campaign and they have to they have to bring out that story throughout the year so

[00:31:40] The story in the release of light fall. I didn't think was gonna be very large for very long because there's a lot of stuff on answered like

[00:31:49] What is the veil? I'm not kind of shit which I think is going to be fleshed out throughout the year with the coming seasons because they release four seasons or something throughout the year So and like there's a campaign missions for each season so they're gonna answer something

[00:32:07] They have to but I think we got a pretty good understanding of what it could possibly be I think it was uh spoilers yeah I'm liking it a lot. I don't know what everyone's problem is

[00:32:21] I thought that was cool. I mean it's hard we were under leveled we were severely under leveled I think for the yes you want to why? Because after you do the campaign it throws you into like a mini campaign for the

[00:32:37] What do they called the fire and spattle grounds What's that that's what the one we just kept getting fucking owned and the power was like 1770 Remember that? I'm like this is ridiculous way too hard so we quit remember oh

[00:32:52] They start you off at a defines battleground at level 1600 after the campaign Oh So don't go do a defines battleground when you're not done the campaign because you're not gonna have a fun time Okay, okay So I did a few early

[00:33:08] Defines they want to do that. I want to do that. I want to do that pretty sweet Um, what else we got here It just looked a gun fighting. I just love cracking and that and the certain guns with the

[00:33:22] Just like oh just the sound and the crushing of the bones my bullets put through enemies and crushing those insect aliens Okay, good insect aliens the elixie yeah, yeah, elixie I haven't really been playing much else just apex

[00:33:44] Go grind in some ranked well I'll tell you something. I got in to the Diablo 4 early access But buying KFC by buying KFC did you over VPN question You have to buy an eat before getting that code. I didn't have to eat any KFC

[00:34:06] So tell you wait what I didn't know tell you what I do I've let tell you so I went on to my phone. I downloaded my VPN app that I own and I ordered KFC through their website to like a random US KFC No, just order for pickup

[00:34:28] Ah, and I bought the cheapest chicken sandwich I could which was like three bucks and it came with the early access key So I ordered it and What KFC did you order to

[00:34:46] Oh, some are embossed and I think order pick up so what they made a sandwich for somebody for pickup and it just nobody came Yeah, just you said there no look at the some cook in the bag is like around how many yeah

[00:34:58] How many of those KFC sandwiches do you think people around the world have ordered over VPN just to get the Diablo access key? I don't know did you just think of doing this or did you read it somewhere? I read it somewhere

[00:35:10] Okay, well, I was like that. I'll probably that makes sense. So then I tried it and it worked So it only cost me like four bucks Canadian to get into the That's good the access without having to poison my body eating a KFC sword preorder or preorder

[00:35:26] Yeah, just avoid the taxation body man. I like KFC sandwiches are good orders from a KFC eight hours away Just so he can't have to eat the food But yeah jumped in it's been a shitty launch has

[00:35:39] Every launch is these days, but it's better to play for how wrong we're able to play for I got to level 10 on my barbarian and I got to level 10 on my sorcerer That was only like maybe three four hours

[00:35:56] I think maybe five hours to have to check I was able to play when I could after released without getting disconnected But then later on in the night I just kept trying to Connect and it was just cue me for two hours

[00:36:10] I'd go to two hours yeah two hours. I go to laundry. I'd watch last of us come back and my PS5 shuts off to save power It kicks me out of the queue so I start to queue again

[00:36:22] So I go play elsewhere and then when I did get in I get disconnected like 15 minutes later Like last night was shit. I couldn't play at all last night So I played for like another I played for like an hour this morning. Oh my sorcerer

[00:36:34] I'm enjoying sorcerer more than barbarian. It's pretty sick and the game looks So pretty but it's disgusting pretty you know, it's like dark gloomy The lighting is so good like the the lantern light in the dungeons and all this oh so pretty looks so good

[00:36:53] Yeah, nice and lilyth like the demon That like started Sanctuary she's the one who created sanctuary with the angel so they both left their respected Like hell in heaven Made sanctuary right and that's where to humans I live yeah, three So that's where what?

[00:37:14] Yeah, it's where we live humans live oh and So they've she's come back to I don't know yet But she's come back and now that she's back the angel has Figured out that she's back so he's got to come back and they're like

[00:37:32] Two rivals so they're always at each other's roots. It's gonna be so sick It's so good. I love the Ablo. Well, I want to try it cool. I hope a data starts on the yeah Opened everyone large 24 to 26 That would be cool to play

[00:37:47] It's awesome. Looks great. Oh, I'm gonna guess it looks great. So I'm gonna get it for ps5 and pc because I've scoured the internet and I believe That it's cross platform everywhere everything just like Overwatch 2 is

[00:38:02] So I'll mobile be playing on the ps5. I'll be buying on the pc Yeah, I'm well I guess I'll get it I'm pumped I'll play it I guess Dan or what are you playing? See if thieves season nine dropped on What they yeah, Saturday

[00:38:22] It came out it's getting long in the tooth. Yeah, that's right. I think I came up Friday and We've kind of just been dipping back in which is nice because it's been a while since me and the other scally wigs have played

[00:38:36] But mostly season nine is just a lot of quality of life changes like The two big ones are auto harpoon unload so when you're like You know you're doing a skeleton fleet

[00:38:48] Which is a fleet of just a shit ton of skeleton ships that spawn on you and you're fighting two gallions at a time Or two sloups at a time or whatever if you sync them and their treasure floats in the water

[00:38:58] And you're just like trying to juggle fighting as well as getting that treasure so you don't you know getting nothing out of it Back in the previous seasons you'd have to harpoon it and then take it off the harpoon and put it on deck

[00:39:09] So you'd have somebody on the harpoon and you'd have somebody grabbing it just back and forth back and forth And we got really good at that and we got really fast and now that is not necessary

[00:39:19] You just hit the harpoon and it auto drops it on to the deck so you just like So it makes it a lot easier For that kind of application. It's just gonna be snatching booty Yeah, some some more just booty

[00:39:32] I'm so sorry to you that shit there's no like it kind of it's weird quality of life changes just such a weird kind of thing because you They they remove the challenge of the game right and if someone's better at that than other players

[00:39:45] You have the advantage over getting that treasure then they do, you know, but now the playing feel is all even so it's like harder to Want Quality of life changes like that because you're like while it removes the teamwork effort It removes the challenge, but

[00:39:59] Can't do anything about it. So We've been using that a lot which is really nice if you're you know loading up treasure from anything It just it's a lot faster the other one is a big one actually which is which I'm a huge

[00:40:10] Proponent for is collectible player resources after shipwreck so if you sync somebody all of their resources float in barrels To the water so you can get everything they had on board from fruit. Oh cannibals would

[00:40:24] Fire bombs anything right, but you couldn't do that before it you would get nothing from sinking somebody if they had nothing You would get nothing so it's like oh doesn't that incentivize people pvp more now Technically and we have been doing a lot of that last two days

[00:40:40] Fucking so many people over because There's that incentive now because the other knife we were basically undefeated we thank once at the beginning of the session and the rest of the night was like two hours of just

[00:40:52] Dominating everyone, but I think we were on an Xbox only server so again. It was pretty balanced But yeah, so those are the two big ones getting resources after sinking people

[00:41:02] So you're just piling on and you become more and more indestructible if you're on it with boarding up and all that shit right You just resources are the tits

[00:41:11] So those are the two big big big quality of light changes that we've been enjoying in season nine other than that just Hogwarts legacy You know I do right now You beat it? No, I'm close to I think

[00:41:26] But I'm taking my time I'm doing a lot of I'm doing like one main mission or main quest Then I'm doing a lot of side stuff. It just taking my time with it how many hours you got in it now like 40 Wow

[00:41:39] Dandoff is the gamer there was a bug that's a time put 40 hours in a game I don't know what have I been playing sushi man Probably like long time you haven't put 40 hours again in a game in all the side book

[00:41:55] Definitely side with that was a new year's ago Yeah, so I was two years ago No, but he put 40 hours in cyberpunk early. Yes Yeah, yeah, that's what I'm talking about. Yeah, my latest yeah, my latest kind of getting my teeth sunk into something Your teeth

[00:42:15] But there was definitely a glitch in that story. It was telling you guys about when it was doing that main When I was doing a main quest or whatever it was and you have to

[00:42:22] Sneak around in a village and avoid these rathes there was an instance where if you if you play from the beginning of that quest And go through all that you remain in the crouched sneaking position

[00:42:33] If you get seen however and have to restart from the checkpoint the checkpoint would start you off in the standing position So you couldn't and you can't because of the instance of the story in the game

[00:42:42] You don't have controls over sneaking and stuff. So you couldn't go back into this knee game position So I'd walk by them and they're like

[00:42:50] And they'd see you and then you'd have to restart. I'm like so I'd have to load my game back to the beginning of that story instance so that I was in the sneaking position It was stupid, but I guess

[00:43:04] Did you guys have something about an update for Hogwarts written in the notes? I did I was we'll talk about a bit later Okay, I was gonna talk about it under gaming news because I'm not sure okay. I'm not sure I know about it

[00:43:14] So anyway, yeah, that's it though. It's just those two for now Cool well, um, I think that's it we can we get some gaming news we can talk about Cyberpunk There was an an recent headlight cyberpunk 2077 will look shinier than ever

[00:43:43] At gdc 2023. Thanks to a visual upgrade. What's this about? How can they upgrade this game even more they're increasing the ray tracing Settings making another ray tracing Give me that 40 died deeply Now I got a 40 90 So like they're just making it look even better now like

[00:44:07] This is from game it was from game rant talk on that I saw that how much is too much like Is there such thing as too much? No, no, I don't think so as long as it's not negatively affecting The performance for me

[00:44:22] No, I might this might not be on well I was gonna say is it on PC all platforms. I'm not sure because it runs great right now Even after or you know everything they've done so

[00:44:32] It would sound you think right drops how long do you think until this cyberpunk will be deets roamed as the gp benchmark like what What will be the next game or how long will it take?

[00:44:45] I don't know man will it ever be deethroned like it's two years old already I think it's gonna be a while because this game was like ground breaking okay well I'll go into my news with come back to your news because my news kind of plays on this

[00:45:03] Okay, okay, so PS5 allegedly on track a PS5 pro allegedly on track for 2024 release I'm not gonna go on to huge details about it. It was a it's a rumor, you know, I'm just saying what is a rumor I thought it was slated to release for

[00:45:21] Having come out and say yes for pro 2024 nobody has their just rumor mills right now with what ifs and whatnot Okay Do you think It will be able to hand it native 4k

[00:45:37] At 60 fps like if you think about it because nothing is hitting like no big game like cyberpunk is definitely not hitting that On the ps5 or the series x right so even with my 3080 can't handle a cyberpunk at native 2k resolution with max graphics and ray tracing

[00:45:56] And I'm getting like with all the bells and whistles and get like 30 fps That's that was a nine $1,000 raffix card the ps5 pro will need to have to be a fucking beast If they think it's gonna hit 4k 60 fps 4k 60 fps is still quite a feet

[00:46:15] You know like it's it's still hard. It do because it's still not what I assume they're doing They're gonna they're just gonna want to have everything at 4k 60 yeah, like But that's probably without ray tracing exactly and then maybe there'll be a performance mode that'll be 120

[00:46:30] Okay my my question two guys is will there always be forever? Now a performance and quality mode on every console that ever releases I don't I don't think that's ever gonna stop because

[00:46:48] Why not it gives options. It's what the one PC do we've been doing it for a long time Yeah, and I think that's a big I think that's ultimately why when I use to like back in the day

[00:46:57] I'm talking 10 years ago. Let's say if I was PC gaining is like oh, I like that I can increase or decrease the graphics Or whatever but I don't have that option on console so whatever I get is what I get on console

[00:47:08] But now it's not really the case anymore, so it is nice to have that that leeway It is yeah, but what about you think this they'll bring in like 8k? You think they're gonna say like oh this will run 8k

[00:47:19] No, I don't think they're possibly run 8k like I remember when they released it on PS5 they said 8k this AK that but people don't understand it was a k Video right it wasn't a key gaming Fucking way they meant a k gaming

[00:47:36] Yeah, so like because they can barely do 4k right right? Right, so if someone has an AK TV and they're playing PS5 games on it it might upscale some way somehow I don't know how

[00:47:48] We do that but a piece of vibe wouldn't I don't think so we just play 4k on it a k screen right? Yeah, I don't want to the TV AI would upscale

[00:47:57] Anyway the 8k on the box of the PS5 is for video content. It's not for gaming anyway Get this though the RTX 4090 Is a $2,300 CPU Canadian $23 CPU Can't even run cyberpunk's max graphics and ray tracing at 60 fps at 4k think about that

[00:48:18] Native 4k without help with ray tracing on it hits around 40 fps What yeah, man I have I have a picture here to prove it this guy was doing all the benchmarks on his 4090 There's no fucking way a PS5 pro

[00:48:38] We'll be able to play games with ray tracing effects at 4k native 60 fps no way not gonna have 10 degrees and by the time ps4 pro comes out there's the games are gonna be prettier

[00:48:52] They're gonna be beefier and they're just gonna have to do a performance and quality mode They're gonna continue so there a to me there is absolutely no space slightly higher yeah, there's slightly higher in the The difference between 4k and your upscaling right so now they're saying

[00:49:11] Is it won't be worth buy I don't know nothing no price for a PS5 pro just for that little increase no No, no or I'm crazy maybe for somebody who doesn't have one yet, but I'm gonna for us. Let's say

[00:49:23] I will not I will not yet no no way no No then like especially when we go back to talking about four more 120 like it might do 120 at higher than it 1080p yes exactly is now yeah, and that's that might even be the only difference

[00:49:38] Like a 2k 120 yeah, but maybe I don't think it'll be worth it either And then what they'll they'll be releasing ps5 pro specific versions of games like the series X and series S to yeah

[00:49:52] Come on, I don't know what a weird time in gaming. Why don't we hear time for that for that reason alone as Currently stands let alone all these new Things they're gonna start introducing new new hardware and I'll just and then you're gonna have yeah

[00:50:05] You're gonna have people seeing different options because they don't have the TV that's compatible or and then they're on ps5 Yeah, like I don't have that Yeah, I don't know and it might do 2k 120 cool if it does but 120 gaming on console my television has VR apparently

[00:50:28] And I have gone I don't really know what it does. I don't notice what it does, but so and that with so what would be the fucking point in getting the p5 pro?

[00:50:39] Just for new players are new new buyers people I guess and people who are gamers who need to have that Like I thought I'd be that person, but I don't see it being much different Because it can't be much different unless they put some ridiculous

[00:50:55] AMD card in there that Is a god of this world, but I don't see that happy and then who's to say you're gonna be able to get your fucking heads out

[00:51:03] Well like people still can't buy pay pay PlayStation 5s and store it again. They're in the shelves now, but are they? I don't know if we might get a corporation a fucking corpo Plaza and I don't see them on the shelves But I don't know didn't stop me

[00:51:21] Yeah, anyway, there you have it. You're gonna focus I didn't have the PS5 for own my notes there are some glad we were able to talk about that There is a big star citizen update guys

[00:51:33] Star citizen you can now use beards on your character facial hair. No, no, I don't think they're tutorial They had tutorial no no no tutorial Those who don't know star citizen is a crowdfunded game that has been in developer 10 years 11 years now

[00:51:57] Over five hundred million dollars in their crowdfunding efforts. It's a space game like a space simulator fighter RPG The launch of star citizens biggest update has been a shambles and players are frustrated This is from PC gamer Oh the update was supposedly according to developers

[00:52:18] They were going to hold the key to true in-game persistence one of the biggest hurdles in the pursuit of a living universe that evolves Inhibitants so I guess the the update was gonna allow for like

[00:52:33] Like if you dropped something somewhere on a planet like it would just stay there like if you dropped a cargo button Persistent and I guess the update turned into a major outage where players couldn't log in to the game or if they could it would just crash

[00:52:50] And you couldn't do basic things in games Fly a ship again get out of your hotel really The user on the forums who's been a backers since day one. Oh god A backers since day one says it is embarrassingly bad even by stars. This is standards

[00:53:10] Well, what do you think about that? I mean, this is just par for the course here They're trying to do so much and that's what I was about say so much in this game to a lot of

[00:53:20] And a patch like a patch that size trying to add that I mean obviously there's gonna be bugs just like I played it yeah, I'm glad I didn't give them money. Oh my god early on in ten years

[00:53:32] You bad or ROI they call that return on investment. Yes, but from what I've played the bugs that I encountered Like they resolved that before this and then piling this on top of that. I mean I yeah like I feel bad for the The day one backers yeah

[00:53:50] $500 million of people's money here can't refund that that's why they just keep going They just keep trucking keep on trucking. Yeah, well, I can't give back half a billion dollars So we're gonna keep this shit fool doing this

[00:54:03] Let's let's put some bets out there how many guys want to how much you want a guy's on a bet that skull and bones is gonna come out before Start something I will never bet that you don't make so I would put proper

[00:54:14] Start citizen is like final because I think they're gonna cancel straight up Scullabones. I don't think they can I told you legally they're under contract to finish the game with the Singapore government So in my opinion I would put $20 I put $20 on scullabones coming up before

[00:54:32] I think Star Citizen just seems so far away still light years. No, yeah being clever Yes light years away. You know what I mean true like true I agree Scullabones don't I mean it's hard to see Star Citizen ever being done at this point

[00:54:50] Man, yeah, it's like the day so it just the way it runs it runs so poorly like it's terrible It's shit. I'm sorry using the cry crying, right? It's using crying but she's old and I couldn't even get 60 FPS on it

[00:55:04] At 2k it was it would ran horribly Yeah, wow anyway that's that Hogwarts like I see had an update and it fixed something that I actually didn't mention it during our episode But I found it exceedingly annoying

[00:55:18] They didn't include in the patch notes, but I guess it was confirmed by avalanche software's community manager They have significantly reduced the frequency of Ignacio Welts Voice line the annoying flu lady finally shut her damn trap

[00:55:34] Like how to put her in the house and convenient it was before I invented Pala da Do you better already played through 50 hours every least yeah, I think I fucking year every time

[00:55:48] I don't even ask you about that like there's a mod for the PC one like day two where so much shut her up Oh really wow I would never even saw that as a problem. It startles me whenever I like it was a noise

[00:56:01] I'm not gonna know I realized it for sure. I definitely noticed it. I was like oh That's it I just hear the voice of my ear like oh God that was it I don't find it annoying. I don't know now

[00:56:11] I don't even notice the the the infrequency of it after the update so I Goes to show you how much it bothered me I guess

[00:56:18] I thought I find it annoying, but I didn't like there was one update where did you see the trolls one the troll come about one No, where you could if you're fighting a troll you could just get on your broom and fly off a

[00:56:30] Cliff and the troll would just chase you on the cliff fallen die and you would get the resources and the experience or whatever And you wouldn't have to take like five minutes ten minutes fighting a troll right?

[00:56:40] But now they patch that so if you fly off the cliff the troll just falls off the cliff and lands and then like Can get stuck there and you can just keep fighting it

[00:56:48] So they they notice players were exploiting because like that's a lot of work to kill a troll and you get like a lot of Experience from it and like a little

[00:56:55] Okay, the troll's all time and I'm a troll killer. Yeah, but if you're early on in the game it's like you're like oh my god If you're a little bitch if you're a little basic bitch wizard That's that but yeah for the gaming news

[00:57:10] I had some things about upcoming games here guys Zelda tears of the kingdom are we gonna is this a day one purchase for us? Are we gonna do like a well this beer next non-spoiler cast potentially, but I have I feel like I have to

[00:57:23] Yeah, I don't know. I would like it to be but I hear you can't go back and do side shit when you beat Ganon in breath of the wild So I'm skeptical about I'm feeling the game for the wild hey, can you Okay, yes, I could potentially

[00:57:40] What I'm gonna beat breath of the wild yeah, I'd have become up come out in a month along with I believe the spider verse two movies coming up Yeah, soon which would be great

[00:57:51] I can't wait to know how have we not heard of anything about that yet? I haven't anyway Yeah, which I guess I'll have the first one on uHD blue rate disc because it's not HDR on fucking Netflix like that movie of all movies is not

[00:58:04] HDR on Netflix. It's just 4k Rose. It's oh it's coming up June, June second so oh could get a good dude nice Nice summer movie good summer movie yes, can't wait for that. Well, that's pretty much it so I guess we can Move on to today's topic

[00:58:34] Today we will be unveiling our very real and not made up at all consoles We are going to describe a bit about them and how they work and why someone would buy them

[00:58:45] We'll also talk about one maybe game or launch title that comes with the console and we may even Show some detailed design pictures very detailed and then maybe we'll do a bowl on Twitter to see who's best

[00:59:01] Yeah, who should go first creative who was most recently going first to how are we gonna do this so are we going to list All the names that we came up with and then talk about the one No, just talk about the one that you yeah

[00:59:17] Let's just talk to the one I really only have the one because I kept rolling with it I've plenty Just dreaming All right, Daniel. I want to see you are mad at I want to see your is Dan let's let's see

[00:59:32] What do you want to start with the the pitch or Tell me what tell us about it. What is it called? What is it so get this okay? The new console that I have Invented is called the pit outlandish, but Stay with me. It's called the dark require

[00:59:56] Okay, but this name and get this this name literally came to me in my sleep on Friday morning And I was like the fuck is that the dark require or fuck yeah man It's not even a word, but it was it sounded hardcore and

[01:00:09] dark require you dreamt about this Let out just yeah, I think it's because I knew I had to invent a console the night before was like Okay, that's gonna be my thing tomorrow and in the morning I was like and it was this device

[01:00:20] I had in my hand in my dream. It was like the dark require us like yes That's so fucking sinister and cool. So I wrote it down. I was like I'm not sure

[01:00:28] Did my name in that it came to me my sleeve? I'm not thinking of another name. So it was like fuck that's cool So because it's fitting because it sounded like some for boating like relic that you're not sure

[01:00:38] You want to fuck with but you still want to get your hands on So the dark require is a new is a brand new console manufactured by Apple and developed by the studio Okay, who brought you dark souls?

[01:00:52] Sekiro Shadows twice and Elden ring get this using the latest patented soul technology. That's S-O-L-E from Apple The console requires a sacrifice of the soul to power it via the controller, which is like a divination sphere with palm memory like a crystal ball if you will okay

[01:01:17] It is bound to you forever after you use it and it cannot be sold or Traded the company warns the company warns side effects of overuse can be unquantifiable

[01:01:29] And may include diminishing your humanity little by little with every use until you waste away to come a shadow of your former self Passing beyond the very living But four crooks. Yeah, but it uses the most cutting edge hardware available to developers in the industry and delivers

[01:01:46] Ungodly frame rate and graphics. Okay fidelity versus performance mode is a thing of the past Microsoft and Sony have both given up on Xbox and PlayStation consoles and have approached from software with offers for buyouts and have been met with silence

[01:02:01] From software as said we wanted the console to perform as if you had sold your soul to the devil Okay, the console appeal. I like you idea Wait, do I have to pay for this or do I just sell my soul to the console? Oh, you must pay

[01:02:17] The price my high This deer The console appeals to avid horror and occult enthusiasts and people who love exclusive unique and really hardcore shit Some of the launch titles were that players can get their hands on it release our sin city published by Maxis

[01:02:37] Okay, they're new associations the Sims since the Sims mobile 2018 we we geez match and Hellraiser 2023. Okay, get this in 1991. This is true. This is fact

[01:02:54] Dan Lawton of color dreams acquired the rights to a hellraiser game and planned to make like an NES game, but the project was canceled So I added when asked why the original game was canceled 32 years ago lot and said they were just waiting for the perfect fucking console

[01:03:12] And the darker choir is it If you guys want to see a picture. I can show that to you now. Oh, yes. Let's see the picture please The dark require events so like it's like infinite

[01:03:27] Infinite frame rate infinite quality the best cost boss game the experience you could ever have and you must pay for it with your soul Okay, so I'll explain it. This is how I picture I picture it as like this emerald dark emerald green like pyramid or like yeah

[01:03:49] Like pyramid like a like a prison like a square based prison yeah, and the infinity symbol on it because it's like yours forever Because of this soul technology like you and you are committing to this you're condemning yourself

[01:04:02] And the stupid little the sphere like the that's the controller. It has like palm memory And you just like move your fingers around on it and it's like glowing

[01:04:11] That's what I came up with I figured I could do it better in that and with color a little bit of color That is funny then my my shitty drawings that I could do

[01:04:21] So that is the console that I rolled with because I just kept writing and I was like yeah That was a lot in my damage. Wow, I mean That's very funny. I Like the idea of that of that just like you can get no better than this

[01:04:34] You have to fucking but you have your neighbor Experience anything like this and you never will What you give your soul Yeah, I thought it was perfect because it would be something I mean in some in some South Park episode or some shit, right?

[01:04:51] Or some far-spon common. Yes, you'd be from software that makes it because of their hard core fucking games that just make you hate You know playing and make you angry and all this shit and you just like that's all that pain and sacrifice

[01:05:03] You know and then Apple would produce it because they're like this weird ask called company Because I went for a hiring center once and it was the weirdest fucking oh, yeah So I figured Apple would be in the perfect manufacturer and from South Florida is the perfect developer

[01:05:19] And so I put them both together and I was like man what other accessories could there be? And I was like should there be like this like color that you have to put on the play it like it would like

[01:05:28] humiliate you and prostrate you with like a gravity or some shit. You're like I love it so much Oh So I think gravity The dark required for like pretty sweet fuck yeah pretty sweet. Well, that's pretty cool. I like it. I like it Nasty what do you got?

[01:05:51] I came up with a few and I landed on this one I Going to say it wrong, but for purposely purposely wrong. Oh, okay purposely wrong so the telephoney Spray station for D Okay, look for only the telephoney like it's phony oh Tell you okay

[01:06:16] It's funny you measure yourself in 4D Feel the game ooze across your fingertips as you dive deep into The immersion of this console and it's Emerciveness Using the essence of moisture and viscous liquids to bring your color close to the game Essence of moisture

[01:06:39] Do I show the picture now? It's so fucking stupid. I'm curious to see well I didn't have any idea to draw it so I asked the AI oh, you know what whatever Oh, okay, you asked the AI to design this. Yes. Oh That's cool looking kind of

[01:07:02] Like the fourth one is cool the fourth one is really weird How did you man? I tried looking at I tried doing AI for mine. I was like this is not working But so wow second one. First one interesting the first one is more like a

[01:07:17] Like a Fisher price toy Yeah, the second one the second one is more my style. It's got the like doctor who kind of looking phone booth and at the top at the top there's that

[01:07:33] Looks like this thing like how big is this? I can't really tell how big is the Sony the phony spray station the telephone It's got to be pretty big so because it's got sprayers on the console top Sprays you as well as some accessories here

[01:07:50] So I got some accessories. There's the controller can be configured to profusely leak liquid for full 4D immersion game The controller can be configured to spray liquid across the room or into your face if you die or do not complete challenges

[01:08:06] There's a hose at attachment sold separately for $600 which you attach you can either attach to The sink in your bathroom to the controller like a little hose or You can buy the liquid tank attachment for the console which is $300

[01:08:27] Attach us to the bottom of the console and you buy the hose obviously attachment sold separately to connect to your controller to the tank So you've got a tank attachment and then a hose attachment to your controller

[01:08:41] They need a fucking full bathroom for this just to play the bathroom Now you could also buy different types of liquid gel capsules to put into the console To make the liquid that's spraying on your face either like very thick or like blood

[01:09:00] Yeah, that kind of stuff yeah The launch exclusive for the telephony spray station for D is plumper simulator Where you fix leaky drains and pipes and unclog shitty toilets and seduce housewives and get paid the big bucks in plumper simulator

[01:09:22] Yeah, so there will be a there's also another console exclusive. So this is just a This is a console exclusive. This is like the Mario brothers of the telephony spray station 40 this is called super gastro brothers

[01:09:38] It is identical to the Mario Bros in every way. It's just there are way more in-game plumbing puzzles that will make full use Of the spray station 40 controls and immersive 40 take full advantage of immersive technology offered by a telephone

[01:09:54] I have a question about the telephony wait one more thing there will be season passes We can earn cosmetic rewards such as different colored overalls and boots and different colored and size Rensches and penises to bang the lonely hounds with oh my goodness

[01:10:10] It's half it's half a sex game to I'm taking part in that. Is it a third person or is it a first person both you can switch you can toggle There's a toggle button on the side I Don

[01:10:30] I had a question. Does it have like a an as a smell Function like can I smell the games? I'm not buying the set part of the 40 40 was the

[01:10:44] Just the spring and the way the sprays and it's gimmick the sprays don't have smells is what you're saying and We obviously it'll it can do air. I think that that might actually be Possible right I could just inject some stink into the gel capsules

[01:10:59] Yeah, yeah, exactly. I'll bring that to the development team Nasty Nate's a pro at injecting stink into things Yeah, that'll work That's gross horrifying Would say the spray station. I love how that's the gimmick it's not that it's just 40 where there's things poking you or shit

[01:11:19] It's like it's specifically wet Like liquid spray that you Oh my god, all right. Well, let me tell you about mine Mine it's called the fartari 6900 The first carbon neutral game console boys made out of sustainable products and it's fueled not by electricity But by biology

[01:11:53] AKA your own body and it's waste products No batteries no wires just pure uninterrupted fun and only needs to be refueled once a day and you can do it while you game nice

[01:12:10] So if you want to support green gaming this is the console for you let me show you a picture Let me show you a picture Hey, God The stains around the underwear that is the fucking sickest thing I've ever seen

[01:12:43] See the drawing we can't do which is why we rely on AI Wow, that's fucking gross. Oh my god, it's broken. Okay, that'll shit I don't have to explain it for the audio listeners. You may want to go check it out on YouTube. Please do yeah, but

[01:13:02] Allow me it comes with a wired controller as well as the main accessory of the system the fartari pantaloons Well, yes, it does resemble a dirty old pair of tidy whiteies It is in fact a highly advanced piece of

[01:13:19] Logically enhanced equipment that delivers your bio waste to the console feel a sealed tubing system The console then converts the fuel to energy to power the dual 4090 GPUs inside now The picture is a

[01:13:41] Man standing playing the game with tubes coming out of his tidy whiteies and various nothing else Just stains on the watercolour brush Yeah, it's got a nice body basically And there's also a front and rear picture Yes, front and rear Painted that with a watercolour brush

[01:14:06] There you go It's a good post required fuel. It has to be cheese chips and soda Shit, that's gonna be fucking fart like you can't just eat any cheese chips and soda goes in and then And then out the tubes into the nice nicely elegant console the fartari 6900

[01:14:27] We talked about bringing games on the to toilet Is it a toilet game well now everything can be a toilet game that's right bring the toilet to your games with the fartari 16900 Yeah, but I need mobile games anymore Wow, so those those tubes are so

[01:14:46] Into the pantalones into those pants they to those other They're so in the ground they're not so they're still the some way it's a yeah, okay. So secret IP secret technology that they have not But yeah, look at that that looks nice

[01:15:06] Your own the Tari these days whoever's the right holder to a Tari now I was gonna say I was gonna talk about my console exclusive the game you play with this is Captain planet battle smashier

[01:15:24] What would an eco friendly console be without eco the eco friendly hero himself Captain planet it's a fighting game Many playable characters for the popular animated series from the early 90s, but this game gives power up an in-game advantage to those who are

[01:15:43] Refueling the console while in a match So interesting finally being lactose intolerant has an advantage What do you guys think about that what do you think about that I play that is my console

[01:16:01] Oh, no, I don't take a pass and have a shit while in-game you get you're getting like powerups like whoa Like it's charging you up in game and you get advantage Just and the tubes are clear see through their like transparent

[01:16:15] So you just see all this shit and fart and when I used stuff when I first saw it I thought like the the fart shit tube goes in and then it comes back out and smushes and

[01:16:26] Spuse it on your cock area like it like it goes like a frisful circle My god, yeah, so that's that and Do you want to talk about other names you had? Yeah, just I don't list oh I don't remember what other ones I had

[01:16:45] I used the one you gave me on that feeling naveshow. Yeah, nice how was the reception? I didn't check it out yet. They like they liked it. Oh, yeah, nice best best name best name We had the best names good. I've got the I've got the colon vision

[01:17:02] Which was a play on the collico vision I had the The turbo max ultra UX With a turbo button you press a turbo button and supposed to do something Then I had The isolation station 64 which with like

[01:17:28] It was I was like a wank pod. Yeah, I was thinking kind of kind of like a like a VR thing where It would have mercy would isolate you from This like everyone else involved like the whole world and Turn you into some anti social

[01:17:43] Goblin because nice you're just in this thing forever. I'll take one And then Then I had the area of the play box Oh my which was just a box just a box

[01:17:59] With the with plastic silicone nipples everywhere and it was kind of like that's kind of like bobbot where you would like Pull it pull them pull them squeeze them Control them yeah control

[01:18:13] And I took I have a picture that one because that was I was gonna go with that one. Oh, I don't know I could think of anything else So here's the picture It looks like a suether

[01:18:26] I got suethers. I couldn't find nipples so I got like those and then I just painted the box what color like The other one would be Oh my god and then my last one was the pixel peep station VR

[01:18:46] Do you have a picture that pixel peep another I That's that you I feel like I mean I said the name of this one in our group chat early I just threw it on for a runner-up. I was like let's see what I can develop on it

[01:18:58] But the wet dreamcast I ended up writing and I was like there's no controller It's a brain dance type accessory like from cyberpunk where you you know, it's like a maybe like a skin Tight ball it's literally a what dream controller. Yeah, right controls

[01:19:14] You were a dream player games in your mind like a dream. You accept you you can actually control them where every game is actually And it's a bit well only in the dark feature in Japan Some of the launch titles would be what

[01:19:28] It's like on adrunners where there's just guys sitting around and VR and there's weird things jerky them off The launch titles would be I just wrote down the rocky horror picture show And leisure suit Larry. I have a white dream of course

[01:19:44] Yes, yeah, I just wrote that down. I was like I don't think I can I don't think I can expand on this anymore than that so That is funny. I didn't I had written a bunch of other ones down

[01:19:56] I don't I don't I don't have them at my chest so easy to do the sexual thing, right? It's so easy to blush that out in there's so many good puns available

[01:20:06] Yeah, I challenged myself with the dark require. I was like no, well you guys have dirty minds I didn't do no sexual thing you're no sir dirty or than anything What do you mean you're just filthy? This is natural. It's natural functions. That's how are the console yeah

[01:20:23] True Well, I think that's it Yeah, we got to think that sure now. We're gonna post these on the on the Twitter We'll just we were not gonna like put a we won't put a description right we're just the picture

[01:20:43] And it asked if you listened what console would you buy? You know What console do you fancy would you like to give your soul away to have the gaming experience of a lifetime Would you like to just be uninterrupted in your gaming and contribute toward a greener earth

[01:21:04] It's the fartari or would you like to get piss sprayed in your face And for D by the Like the phony Spray station the telephone is pretty It's even for a murder. Let us know you have to let us know

[01:21:21] Um, yeah, that's it for this week's episode. I think Thank you everyone for taking the time to listen and and have some laughs with us if you're listening to this Check off check out our YouTube we we we post some shorts

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