Episode 130: Asshole Gamers 2 - Princess Birdo

[00:00:00] Hello and welcome to Gaming Together, cooperative podcast.

[00:00:11] I'm your host Bootyhole McStuffins and I'm here with my co-op partner Gloryhold Dorkenstein.

[00:00:16] Each pod we play through a cooperative experience and relate to you to the listener if this

[00:00:19] game is a criminal or crime of co-op or something better off playing solo.

[00:00:22] Hey Gloryhold Dorkenstein. And then I got a horrible sinus infection and dude I did I this is I've had sinus infections before I didn't know that it could hurt as bad as it as it was hurting like Okay, I'm a mailman for people who don't know and everyone knows but these trucks are like Pieces of aluminum foil held together on a Mario Kart engine, right?

[00:01:43] And they vibrate right so I had I had doing I'm doing a lot better So we are a video games podcast and we're gonna be talking about some video game assholes this week But before we get there, let's just check in with what we've been playing. Nave. What have you been playing? All right. We haven't hit talked for a little while. So I actually went through and

[00:03:03] started beating the shit out of some games because I

[00:04:04] I need to talk to you about stupid cyberpunk because there's a section.

[00:04:06] This is near the end. They even put a big, hey, this is this is the point of no return.

[00:04:10] Point of no return point.

[00:04:11] Be careful.

[00:04:12] And I'm like, I'm on elevator.

[00:04:13] I'm ready to not return.

[00:04:15] Let me go.

[00:04:16] And so I go in there.

[00:04:17] You end up getting basically dragged back

[00:04:22] to Dr.

[00:04:23] Frankenstein.

[00:04:24] And he's like, I can't believe it.

[00:04:25] My boy is dying.

[00:04:27] You know what you got to take your it's That's your own hands When has your character ever been suicidal in any regard or any point at all?

[00:05:43] It's just like it's just a snap decision friend that you just kind of have hanging around like crazy Terry at work who's talking about how, you know, the the birds and CIA and all this stuff.

[00:07:01] Yeah.

[00:07:02] Crazy Terry is great.

[00:07:03] Tell you all about Bigfoot hunting.

[00:07:04] Now he goes up every winter, never catches know, I never want to talk to her. And then there's a robot butler driver. And he was the coolest dude in the whole game. Like every time. And he's like, hey, one of my cars, my Mario cards are going bonkers down the street.

[00:08:22] Can you go help him?

[00:08:23] And then the car is like the pink flamingos that need to be destroyed.

[00:09:24] So you can't if you finish Johnny's stuff like get his band back together and everything which is sad.

[00:09:25] You didn't do it.

[00:09:26] Oh, I saw that and I'm like, what?

[00:09:28] Rogues on a part of it?

[00:09:29] Well, rogue is a part of it.

[00:09:31] But like, you can you literally get his actual band together and you go and play a new another

[00:09:36] concert like a returning.

[00:09:38] Oh, the band.

[00:09:39] Yeah, yeah.

[00:09:41] But and also you do get the criminal band back together too.

[00:09:45] But so when you do that, you get to go your brain into the satellite or you can just, we can dump you back on the street and let you die naturally. Is that the same thing that happens for you? Yeah, it will. Yeah. So each ending, it goes to that same nexus point because no matter what you got to get Johnny out of your head, the moment this is this is, I mean, we're already the crazy spoilers,

[00:11:03] but the moment that you plug yourself into that computer, you die.

[00:11:07] No matter what you are already dead. I enjoyed my time with it, but so many things felt either like maybe it was rushed or I missed weird, maybe it's because I played it for the core story, but maybe I missed extra story beats. Like a lot of things just felt like V was just an insane person not doing what I wanted him to do. Like V never responded. Like, I don't know. The other thing is like everyone's criminal scum, which, you know, which I found really

[00:12:24] the opposite of starfield.

[00:12:26] I know.

[00:12:27] Like there's no good guys in cyberpunk. I mean like after your warning be like hey skip to here if you really we are gonna fucking We're gonna go nuclear on some game Alright cool, and then be like also nave is serious. He really didn't spoil Alright but phantom livers are ink

[00:13:42] It was super cool and awesome. I didn't cry though unlike an Alan wake to kind of a load of horse shit, but this is the thing All right, I kind of agree with him to a degree There's a you by the way, you don't only need to just play Alan wake one you need to also play control and probably the DLC and And probably a little bit of quantum break just to have a couple of other things There's so much state shit that this game throws at you. This is the MCU of

[00:15:04] You're making this a Marvel Cinematic thing bullshit

[00:16:07] not played nor knows nothing about, you know, any of these games and they seem to follow the game just fine. I think that I think the thing is, is that you're going to miss a ton

[00:16:11] of context, but the game is so weird and strange. It's so like twin peaks and fucking, you know,

[00:16:18] galaxy balls or whatever. It's so fucking brain Kydrone collided all the time what I'm playing every single month. I don't know The game has a lot of bugs. What are the games are in there in the list?

[00:17:43] Like oh my god is Tommy Machiado from the darkness too long like it has like seven endings where I'm like okay the end and then there's another fight and like okay and then there's another final oh okay but um I don't know the game is incredible and in kind of hard but anyway I'm playing like a dragon Gaiden the man who erased his name and this is what I'm

[00:19:00] gonna be doing title oh yeah I love the and the series is now renamed to like a dragon. So it's like a dragon seven like a dragon and yeah terrific. Thank you Japan. The 8 is on there if it will it's on the list the list of five games which by the way you want to look at that list you I mean you want to look at the list of the games nominee for game of the year not really yeah it's not actually surprising what's on there actually I'm very surprised that spider-man made the list are

[00:21:42] you because it's it seemed like that game got a really lukewarm reception I mean let's see. Where is it from? I've finished my hunter games And so I was like, you know what I'll do some crowd work I'll put out a poll on X and this is probably I'm gonna be picking my games from now on And I'll see what our audience thinks I should be checking out. So for instance, I put out a poll

[00:23:01] between tactics ogre Castlevania Lords of Shadow

[00:24:04] Twitter go or X go and follow us and look for my little polls at

[00:24:07] game together pod

[00:24:14] Links in our little link tree down below, but I've been playing Metal Gear cereal some better gift cereal five phantom pain and

[00:24:20] Dude, this is my first Metal Gear and the game is incredible. Oh, yeah, don't get used to it Don't think that this is how all the Metal Gear games are. What do you mean?

[00:24:24] This is the black sheep of all good one. What are you trying to say?

[00:25:23] not describe the story of this game like have you played it?

[00:25:27] I played quite a bit, but I mean, I think I got like a little

[00:25:29] I think I got close to halfway. I don't know. I found quiet and everything, but I just got distracted

[00:25:33] by a bunch of other shit.

[00:25:34] Oh, man. And this is the it's so weird because the followers are actually useful

[00:25:39] because in the beginning, they give you battle horse.

[00:25:41] And I hate battle horse battle horse can die.

[00:25:44] And battle horse is bad. Oh my God, 10 out of 10 posture. But whatever. And so I'm back and. Man, it's just they everyone calls you big boss. And I know there's something to do with there's like clones and nano machines and well, it might not be clones, it just might be brothers. Like Snake has an evil brother, I think.

[00:27:01] Liquid Snake, maybe do a solid thing.

[00:27:05] The Christian Lord gets next to me.

[00:27:07] Cassius.

[00:28:04] And you get a sprint up there and he goes woof woof woof woof and little icons just start popping

[00:28:10] Dog in god it cracks me up

[00:28:17] That diamond dog just gets like goggles and more armor as as he levels up And so he goes from just like a dog with an eye patch because of course he has an eye patch. Oh my god

[00:28:22] It's the game is just so incredible

[00:28:24] I get it makes me smile anytime something happens because good snake and you see diamond dog like come around the corner. He's like a wolf now with an eye patch in a knife.

[00:30:42] historical, accurate kind of storytelling. They're like, Oh, and then the Soviets did this in the 1980s,

[00:32:23] rararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararararar at silver, well you start at something else, but like the first time you're even made aware of this you're already getting promoted to silver. And so they were like, all right, and this is all the stuff that you get when you get to gold and then this is the requirements and good luck out there. And as soon as I stopped the conversation, it's like, you're a gold rank member. And I'm like, yeah, it's not gonna talk to them again and get all that whole entire gaming knowledge to appreciate it so then he pays for it but plays it and he's like this fucking isn't that good? No because I paid I think I paid $60 for Shadow of Wardore or Mordor whichever one it was whenever that came out and I 100% got every achievement in that game maxed it out like

[00:33:41] completed every cyclist I love that stuff powered at this point I can just pop out of the top of the box which you can if you just push the left trigger or whatever to aim Snake will pop out of the top of the box go into bullet time and then you start-

[00:35:01] And they're all like

[00:35:02] AHHH

[00:35:03] I like turning the-

[00:35:04] That cardboard box is moving

[00:35:06] Dude

[00:35:07] It's so funny by Alan Wake. I think about the last time and I remember. Yeah, well, it's good. It was worth it. It was my Metal Gear Solid. What I bought three games, actually. I bought Witcher, the complete edition or whatever. Tales of Arise and Scarlet Nexus.

[00:36:21] I saw the rise just in time for the DLC to get released.

[00:36:26] Oh, do they?

[00:36:27] Yeah, which I just got that from Amazon, like if I went on there and order those, all three of those games together, $75, not insane. But if I wanted to buy them digitally on Xbox, it would be $140 because none of them are on sale right now. And Witcher is still 40 bucks, Arise is 40 bucks.

[00:37:40] And Scarlet Nexus is listed at 60 bucks.

[00:37:43] Still, they have not dropped that game's price.

[00:37:45] Are they, they're dummies. He is dying. That's probably it because like they they literally just had like stickers It looked like gas like garage sales that were like 75% off and they were just stuck to the the edges of the games They're like all these games 50% off 75 home. We did not. We weren't able to finish our games this week. Both of them were giving us issues. One was running at like 75 percent speed as Dungeons 4.

[00:40:21] And the other one, they just can't connect.

[00:40:24] You know, very annoying.

[00:40:25] Yeah. So we want to talk about how you spelled Witcher a character named Tor and a character named Odin, and they're fucking cool. Actually, they're in like control. I mean, I'm not spoiling anything. He says those spoils things. All right, so we actually have a theme for the Am I the Assholes this week. Nate was late, so I took the privilege of going ahead and picking our Am I the Assholes,

[00:41:40] and Dear Lissa's at home, see if you can put it together

[00:41:43] and figure out what the connecting theme

[00:41:46] between our three different Am I'll go for it. All right So this just happened in a group text between several friends and myself My friend was saying that he plans to invite a girl over on a night where all of us had had planned to hang out Together we'll call this girl Daisy Daisy has a rare condition called. Oh god. What did I decide to read? ecto ecto

[00:43:02] Extrodactyl will extra. There's two there's two why is within three letters. I

[00:44:04] asks if Daisy is the fingerless girl." This kind of upset me because the last time Daisy came over, Peach was kind of bitchy

[00:44:09] and it apparently made Daisy uncomfortable and so we cut our evening short that night.

[00:44:15] Why are they naming Daisy Peach?

[00:44:17] It's just distracting me.

[00:44:18] Then Peach started making jokes about how her hands are the only way I can identify

[00:44:23] her after I explained to her that Daisy probably, but rather hey I know how you get upset when people say things about you, so you shouldn't do that to other people

[00:45:40] Edit what I more accurately said was hey peach since a reference of Waluigi was talking shit about Peach and then Peach found out and felt bad. Oh, okay. So Waluigi's talking shit, so it's different, but really Waluigi was just giving his honest opinion to us in private.

[00:47:00] His exact words were, nah, she's too annoying to be here,

[00:47:04] to be more than a friend.

[00:47:05] It wasn't even that bad.

[00:47:07] What the fuck did I just read? without Daisy even being aware of it. Yeah well I think it's kind of more along the lines of he's pointing out a hypocrisy that she is she gets upset when people say mean things about her but she says mean things about other people. It's a little bit he also he's, he's jumping out there and he's burning peach down on this one. I feel like I don't think that's it because he mentions that he doesn't feel bad about making jokes about her. He said that he doesn't care if he gets made fun of. So he's pointed like, so it's the opposite for Daisy cause Daisy makes fun of her, but gets upset when

[00:49:42] she's made fun of back essentially. Like he's in on it as long as you're not being cruel to

[00:51:01] each other, then it's whatever say whatever you want.

[00:51:04] You know, it's funny about that is while you were talking

[00:52:07] But I am self aware enough that when I hear something funny, even at my own expense, it's still funny to me. Like whenever, like there was an episode a while back where you were telling a story and it was at my expense.

[00:52:14] But it was it was with Jana where I was getting pissed off about a game I can't remember.

[00:52:19] And like I went on like a 15 minute rant and then account? This is am I the asshole for stealing my neighbors, kids, toys

[00:53:40] and giving them away from the glam reaper?

[00:53:43] And I think this is a main account.

[00:53:46] He's got a. All right. So back to the title, this one. Am I the asshole? We're stealing my kids or my neighbors kids toys and giving them away.

[00:55:03] Now I know how this sounds.

[00:55:05] The title for sure makes me sound like a massive dick, right?

[00:56:05] the kid, but the parent in this case is an alcoholic who does not watch her kids. Her kids do not respect their own toys or their own parents things stuff sometimes breaks falling to the

[00:56:11] patio. But when it doesn't, I take it to give to the thrift store or other kids. At first I tried

[00:56:18] returning the toys, but then the mother threatened me. She also kicked someone else's door down.

[00:56:24] She's very problematic. And I want nothing to do with time. I argue he's just a businessman. Oh my God. All right. So born it down. This guy, he's been. OK, there's kids on the fifth floor throwing things that are landing on the patio for the second floor. And this guy is taking them and giving them away. Instead of returning them, Waluigi saw him and like

[00:57:44] these boys threatened to call the cops on him.

[00:58:45] Yeah, I don't know but uh so the patio on the second floor these kids are on the fifth floor throwing their shit down

[00:58:53] And then they just go on right like they don't come and get them it seems like maybe this is like a

[00:58:56] like a courtyard type thing

[00:59:02] Maybe person I don't know I mean, I don't know I rarely lived in apartments in my life Yeah, my apartment isn't never lit ghetto. Oh, I don't know what the fuck this shit is

[01:00:03] Better kids like there's I bet kids play on the patio

[01:00:08] So what if he just made like a bucket or something like that and or just put like a small tote out there and be like Hey, here's the the toy bucket a little Jimmy go get a hot wheels that is half dented from falling for flights of stairs

[01:00:17] Or whatever down fucking you a public bucket for kids toys. I'm pretty sure that's how the coronavirus started

[01:00:23] No, maybe all right, so maybe it's not the most sanitary's non binary and he lives in Seattle. So I don't even know where that's at. It's in Washington. Yeah, so I think this guy's an asshole. He should just push it all in the corner if he really cares about the space being clean. Yeah.

[01:01:40] If you got anything, we can move on to the next.

[01:01:42] Yeet them.

[01:01:43] Yeet them back up into the kids window.

[01:01:46] Throw them up into the up there. Wow. Yeah. What she. Yeah. When something bad happens, like the Netflix is taking too long to load. She just. All right. Well, you read this one. I'm looking through the messages. Is there nothing in here that's fun? What do you mean? The messages are you talking about? Like is his history history? Yeah.

[01:03:00] Oh, let's take a look.

[01:03:02] We can we can take a minute to look.

[01:03:03] Took me a while to get past the fucking Waluigi energy post.

[01:03:07] They replied a lot to play. I then said I feel like she's Peach on the outside but Waluigi on the inside, she always does the WAAAAA!

[01:04:23] Like all the time so I just ran with it. She asked me to elaborate and I said she has Waluigi's now. All right. We're going to see. There you go. This is it. When you realize your only purpose was to give Wario a tennis partner. OK, perfect. I mean, there's a lot of Mario characters like that, like Toadette. Berto. Well, I guess Berto was in Super Mario Bros.

[01:05:41] Two, but still.

[01:05:44] I don't know.

[01:05:45] There's a lot of these alternate characters that are just there

[01:06:51] So well, I want to ask you this while you're doing that then what is your go to Mario character then like which one do you choose whenever you choose one or which one even identify with?

[01:08:20] Is a wall? I pick Waluigi quite often. Yeah, I I'm more of a I'm a spontaneous kind of guy. So I usually don't like to pick Mario either I'll be Luigi. Luigi's pretty fucking cool. Nobody don't pick Mario and don't pick Donkey Kong or I will boo you. What about Peach? What's your stance? Just less interesting Daisy. I think so too. Daisy's cooler. Yeah, she's the alternate color scheme.

[01:08:23] Not as cool as Birdo though.

[01:08:25] Birdo.

[01:08:26] That's the thing. I'm definitely more the wallowy. I unironically make a wah sound sometimes. Like when I, there is a clip of us playing, what is it? Final fantasy origins where I get hit by a cactar and I fall off the ledge and I literally

[01:09:44] go, oh, as I fucking fall to my desk, I literally do it. Oh, that's more. That's like a Mandela effect. I bet Waluigi wears long sleeves. Does he? I think Wario has short sleeves. I think you're right. I think Waluigi does have a sweater. Wario and Waluigi. Yeah, Wario has short sleeves. So I guess he would and they do have different letters on their gloves.

[01:11:01] So I guess that could work.

[01:11:03] Spoiler for next year.

[01:11:04] And I love the Wario wear games as well.

[01:11:07] They're so funny.

[01:12:09] you think the secret connection between all these were I'm pretty sure it is Seattle all these yes they actually all take place in Seattle you know

[01:12:15] Saskastra one is right next to it neighboring cities they've been rivals

[01:12:22] for a long time the connection is actually none of these have to do with