They've Read The Fanfics | The Big Deal

[00:00:04] Step into Video Game Land. Welcome to Fine Time. Hello, party people. It's your boy, Dre. Back once again. It's my boy, Steve.

[00:00:33] Back once again. I'm here almost every week. Back once again. It's my boy, Kevin. Kevin Origins. Dynasty Kevin Origins. I know you're in the mood. I'm trying to get you excited. Thank you. Oh, I'm excited. Although, Kevin, I don't think you could pass for a Chinese warlord from 2000 years ago. I'm just saying. I think some of the facial hair in the screenshots you've sent, I could pull off, though.

[00:01:02] You could. If you gave it some work. I think we all could. We're beardy men. Can you see me with a Fu Manchu? I can, actually. I can. I mean, I can, but it's all advised. I would not. You know what I could see Steve with? The Wolverine, like the giant mutton chops, and then like nothing here. Oh, yeah, me too, actually. Does he have like a little mustache to go with it, or is it all bare and just the chops? No, all bare. All bare. The reverse goatee, basically.

[00:01:31] What about like one tiny little soul patch to complement it? Maybe. I feel like his hair isn't dark enough, though. I think if he had like jet black, black ass hair, I feel like maybe. We do have that in my family. Yeah. He could do a soul patch. It might have some like gentlemanly gray in it, but that's okay. Well, shit. You see? Well, I was going to say you see me, but you can't see me on this shitty ass webcam. You can't see a goddamn thing. Wait a minute.

[00:02:01] That's not Andre's mic. All right, guys. You knew this day was coming because it has been coming for months, and this day is here. I'm going to talk about Dynasty Warriors Origins for a little bit here while you guys pretend to care. How about that? Just try your best. Please just try your best. I do care for your sake. Thank you. While I also care for your sake, I also played the demo and thought it was pretty good. Okay.

[00:02:31] I'm glad you played the demo. I did not know what the fuck was going on, but I did try. It looks pretty. Oh, it's incredible. They started off at a pretty late level. I'm surprised they made the demo that advanced, you know what I mean? Instead of something earlier in the game, but I'll get to that. Let's talk Dynasty Warriors Origins.

[00:03:06] So do you guys remember where we first saw this? Was it like Summer Games Fest? Or was it a state of play? Do you remember where Dynasty Warriors Origins first happened? It was one of those shows because I remember going through it and being like, guys, was it game awards? No. No, I think this was a state of play because it was very, look, this is PlayStation 5. Look at all these guys on the screen. And then Andre was like, this is what I wanted.

[00:03:35] That's what I wanted the whole generation. Little did I know Astro Bot would give it to me first. But now I'm getting it on this level. But yeah, I played that demo a couple months ago. And even though that demo blew me away, I still had some slight trepidation because of the praise that it was getting from people who don't really play Dynasty Warriors. But other people aren't supposed to like Dynasty Warriors. Only I'm supposed to like Dynasty Warriors.

[00:04:05] Only me, right? But you guys know how that gives me some sort of trepidation. Maybe I'm just always gun shy from 20 years ago from Resident Evil 4 or whatever. But like when everybody starts liking something that they don't usually like, it makes my brain go, uh-oh. But as it turns out, I have nothing to worry about. Dynasty Warriors Origins is incredible. And this was not guaranteed because I know you guys don't know this, but Dynasty 9 was fucking terrible.

[00:04:34] That game was awful. Everyone shit on it. Critics usually shit on Dynasty anyway before Origins. That's what also made me nervous. But critics also always shit on these, but everyone shit on Dynasty 9. Not even the most diehards like me could abide by that game. And that was like in 2018. And it had been a long time since the Dynasty Warriors. And then they come back with Dynasty Warriors Origins. Okay, a bit of a re- not a reboot, but just, okay, let's settle the land.

[00:05:03] You know what this game is? It's The Force Awakens. It's just, it doesn't need to be the best Star Wars movie. It just needs to be good. We need to establish Star Wars as something people will actually go to the theater and watch. And I feel like that's what Dynasty Warriors Origins is. I'm sure people have their own thoughts on Force Awakens, but that's how I took that movie. And that's what I feel like. Is Gen Alpha retconning Dynasty 9 to be good? Oh, no. Nobody is ever pretending that game is good.

[00:05:33] Well, I don't know. Maybe someday it'll get its comeuppance. I think there are some alphas who are trying to retcon Sonic 2006 and pretend it was good. And it's like, dog, you weren't even alive. I don't even want to hear your opinion. If you were alive, you were shitting in your diapers. You have no idea. Do not pretend that game is good. Anyway. They did it with Skyward Sword. So I don't know. Oh, come on. Be nice. He said the one guy who only played it once said. I don't know.

[00:06:02] You are the only Skyward Sword liker. I know. I got to play it again just to make sure. Don't. Let's talk about Dynasty Warriors. I know. Let's pause the podcast while I play Skyward Sword HD. See you later. See you later, Steve. We're going to meet and Kevin are going to talk about Dynasty Warriors Origins. Yeah.

[00:06:25] So for anyone who doesn't know for some reason how these worked in the past, Dynasty Warriors, basically you pick a guy, Cao Cao, Guan Yu, Zhang Fei, whoever you like. Right. And then you do a series of missions from that faction's perspective, like four or five, six, sometimes seven or eight of them. If it's a really important person like the aforementioned Cao Cao. And then it's over. There's not even really like an ending or whatever. I mean, sometimes. Right. But it's just like, that's what you do.

[00:06:55] And then it's like, oh, I'll try it with this guy. Oh, I'll try the other side. I'll pick Dong Zhuo this time. And I'll try it from the evil side. You get all sorts of perspectives. The thing with Dynasty Warriors Origins is that you don't play as those officers anymore. This time, you're just a nameless young man who has no idea who he is or where he's from, because guess what? He has amnesia. Have you guys ever heard of that before? Man. Yes. 12 years ago in Fire Emblem Awakening specifically. Yes.

[00:07:25] Okay. Let me write that down. Fire Emblem Awakening. Invented amnesia. Got it. There we go. It's been done once before. Well, no. In this specific case, that's Robin Solstead. Crom finds him in a field. He's like, hey, you want to be my new boyfriend? Also, oh, I mean, tactical advisor. Oh, we know what's going on in these games. Please. They've read the fanfics. They know what's happening. They're not stupid.

[00:07:55] They get it. Right? I mean, come on. Oh, God. Whoever wrote Dynasty Warriors Origins definitely read the fanfics. I mean, Jesus Christ. Is this a horny game? You know, it's not horny, but it does have your typical friendship or bond levels. You know what I mean? So you don't. I'm not going to say you date the Dynasty Warriors, but you definitely you have some conversations that feel a little. Wow. I didn't know you felt that way about me. Guan Yu.

[00:08:25] Okay. Damn. That staff is so long. Can you show me how to use it sometime? Hold on. I want to read this thing exactly because it was so funny. When I was getting my friendship. Oh, I found it. I was getting my friendship level up with Guan Yu and I met him at some weird little outdoor thing. We're both having tea.

[00:08:53] And then I was like, oh, you want to you want to hang out tonight? I'll meet you at the end or something like that. So I said, yes. And then he said to me, and I quote, tonight, I wish to etch the features of your face and the sound of your voice into my memory. Damn. That is hot. If that's not a date, I don't know what is. I mean. How hard did you swoon? Oh, I swooned. Oh, I swooned. I was like, oh, man.

[00:09:22] They got a close up of his face and beard and everything. It was like, oh, man. It was time. I didn't know I could date the Dynasty Warriors. Anyway, you play as this nameless, memoryless person. And on the surface, that seems bad because I feel like the entire appeal of Dynasty Warriors is that you get to be Xiaohu Yan or whoever you like. That's the appeal.

[00:09:51] But if you're just a dude, is that really still Dynasty Warriors? And the answer is yes. It actually does work. And that's for a few reasons. So the first reason is that Dynasty Warriors is always fairly heavy on story, as in there's like a lot of cut scenes between battles and like occasionally during battles. I don't know how much Dynasty or Samurai Warriors you guys ever played, but you guys have been mowing down people.

[00:10:17] And all of a sudden you just it just cuts to a cut scene of like two people having tea before they come out to battle. It's like, OK, I was fighting. I'm not sure. I'm not sure why this is happening now. But yeah, that doesn't happen very much during battle anymore, if at all. But you do get all that story stuff. And I'm going to be honest, that stuff never really stuck with me when it came to Dynasty Warriors or Samurai Warriors, just because it's like it's not really what I was there for. And it's presented so flat.

[00:10:44] And I don't want to say boring, but just kind of matter of fact. It's not presented in like a very interesting way. So if you're just a nameless protagonist and people are just talking to you, that automatically makes it a lot more interesting because you're just you're kind of going with the flow. You're helping out these people. You're helping out those people. You're kind of going here and there. You're not bound to one faction. So you're seeing all the sides and you're seeing what their motivations are, good or evil.

[00:11:14] And you're seeing what they're up to, which is kind of fantastic. It actually makes those cut scenes now worth it, even though you're just a dude and every cut scene just ends with him just sort of staring blankly and just like, OK, I guess I'm I guess I'm moving on now. So it's kind of weird, but it works.

[00:11:35] Another reason why this works and probably maybe more important than the first reason is that in battle, it makes more sense why you're doing what you're doing, because now when now you're in battle is like a hired hand. You're just kind of fully experiencing the battle as is instead of just being part of a faction. And quite frankly, that's OK. You know, this isn't Dynasty Warriors 10, right? It's Dynasty Warriors Origins. It's it. This is something else. And I think that's good.

[00:12:05] And I like that. That's part of the onboarding process. And it's funny you mentioned, Kevin, that like you didn't know what the fuck was going on in the demo. And I don't blame you. It's overwhelming. But as because that again, that demo lets you play so far into the quote unquote future of the game. If they gave you like an earlier demo, you'd probably catch on better. Is that the earlier missions are much more authored. It's like, OK, go do this. Now go do that. Oh, help this person. Oh, climb up here. Do whatever. Right.

[00:12:36] Eventually, what they start saying to you is, hey, you seem like you know what you're doing. How about you just do whatever you think is right? And just go do that. Which is how Dynasty. Make informed decisions on where you're going and what you're doing. There's still a wrong way to do that. I've got to assume. Exactly. Because there's parameters that will make you lose the battle. You can't have this person be defeated or whatever to protect Lou Bay from being defeated. If he gets defeated, you automatically lose. Right.

[00:13:02] So you need to see if he's in trouble and go help him if need be. But the game teaches you that up to that point, you know, because I'll be, hey, Lou Bay's in trouble. Go back there right away. And then you'll go. Then you'll have to go do that. You won't have much of a choice in the matter. As the game progresses, it becomes a lot more like Dynasty Warriors of Old where it's like, okay, you innately know, hey, these guys are pincering us from either side. Let me go. Should I go to the left? Should I go to the right? Should I stay in the middle and protect our leader? Right.

[00:13:32] The game through story actually sort of onboards you, which is honestly the best kind of tutorial that you can have. It doesn't feel like one. It feels like you're just playing the game, which is stupendous. It's something I was worried about. Sacrilege. I know, right? Look, Steve, I'm sure some people will complain. Actually, it might be a good comparison to something we played near the end of our previously creative endeavor where we played the great Ace Attorney.

[00:14:01] And that first game tutorials the fuck out of you. Oh, my fucking God. It's insane how much they do. It's like, guys, I understand not everyone has played Ace Attorney, but this is like the seventh, eighth, ninth one. We don't need to do this this way. Right. Second game makes up for it completely. And the first game is still good. But, you know, you remember us complaining about that. I was afraid Dynasty Warriors Origins would be like that, and it's not. Yeah, it's just a lot of fun.

[00:14:30] I'm not going to sit here and describe the battle system to you guys or anything because that feels like useless. Everyone knows how Dynasty Warriors play. But just know that it's better than ever. It's incredible. And that is aided by graphics on PlayStation 5, baby, because this is the thing I wanted. I wanted to see a million things on the screen. I wanted to see a new Dynasty Warriors made for new real hardware that would take advantage of it. And they've done it, man. They have really done it.

[00:15:00] You know, the last 10 years of Dynasty Warriors in the PS4 era have been really hit or miss. You know, they still targeted 60 frames a second. Nothing really got there. I guess Samurai Warriors 4 kind of ran in the 50s most of the time, right? But they struggled. They struggled with upping the fidelity versus performance. They really, really did. And there's stuff like Berserk Band of the Hawk that ran like sub 30. I waited until PS5 to play that game because I ran 60 without a hitch.

[00:15:29] You know, so it's just it was all over the place in that era. Now those days are over. We can have there's no more compromising. You know what I mean? So many guys on the screen. It looks amazing. There's cool weather effects sometimes, which also doesn't drop the frame rate. It's crazy. There's some large scale battles. Kevin, did you get to the part in the demo where you got to like sort of the enemy base? And it was just like they're all rushing in. You all got to rush in at once. And it's just like that shit looks crazy.

[00:15:59] Crazy. Okay. Let me, you know, I just, okay. I don't, I'm not, I don't want to like challenge where you're coming from because I get why it's cool when there's so much going on. But is there like, because it did feel maybe a little bit messy to me. And again, because I didn't know what the fuck was going on, but there's so much happening. And that's cool from like a tech and aesthetic standpoint. But it was like, there was so much going on that I was like, I have no fucking clue what I'm supposed to do. I don't know who my guys are.

[00:16:28] I don't know who like the bad guys are. Like, it's just, there's so much happening. Yeah. It's supposed to feel chaotic. That is on purpose. That is, that is the feel of the game. And especially those kinds of moments, they're supposed to feel like a lot. A lot has happened. There's seven different enemy officers. There's like, oh, you need to knock down these guys who are shooting arrows at you. Like it's like, it's like a whole fucking thing. And also these three guys are up your ass trying to kill you as well.

[00:16:58] It's, it's a lot. And it's supposed to be a lot. And I get why that's not for everybody, but I'm glad, I'm glad you at least experienced it. So, you know, you know what I'm talking about. Do they kind of like ease you into that at least though? Like when you talk about it, kind of like doing this organic tutorial and teaching you how to play as you go, you know, at the start, like, even if there's a lot going on, is it, you know, maybe, maybe like the bad guys are wearing. Red and the good guys are wearing blue, like a little bit just to like clean it up so you can ease into that a little bit. Or is it, is it like, it's always going to be messy.

[00:17:26] Well, even while you're learning, it's always going to be messy to a degree, because again, that's like, that's it. That's on purpose. That is a feature, not a bug at the same time. Yes. What you're saying is correct. Cause the game doesn't start you out that crazy. They let you do something really impressive and, and wide scale in a demo because they want you to see that stuff. But in reality, they will ramp you up to that. So by the time you get there in the real game, you will be prepared to do that stuff. So, you know, it's not, it's not fun.

[00:17:56] It's just like, you know, if, if this game was on sale for $20, I would be intrigued to like give it an actual try, but it, it, it seems intimidating. Yeah, it is intimidating. And yeah, especially if you just play the demo and you were not a, I know you're not really a Musa. Did you even play Hyrule Warriors? Did you play anything? Not all of it. I played it. Well, I mean, who can? It's a lot. Yeah. Yeah. Not, not that much of it. Andre, cover your ears.

[00:18:24] Kevin, Age of Calamity might be your speed. If you're looking for clarity of who you're fighting versus who you're not. I didn't, I, what? Did you say something? I didn't hear anything. I'm just saying that that's a bit easier to follow. I, I, I, I took a lot of time to that game. Yeah. Um, I still, I still need to get that game. Maybe on a switch too. They'll let me play at 60 anyway. But like, yeah, I, oh, here's something that, and I, Kevin, I get that you were confused.

[00:18:52] Here's something that they actually cleaned up from old games. It's like the clarity of battle messages. Cause people are talking. We don't know how they're magically talking to each other on the battlefield here and there, but they are. That's just how the Ice of Calamity works. Hey, Zhao Ho Yun. Did I leave my teacup at your house? Um, yeah, it's, it's a lot, right? Before, because it's like, oh, you defeated this enemy officer. Oh, come help me. Oh, this guy's attacking me. And it's all like a mess.

[00:19:21] And if you're not, if you're not really paying attention, really paying attention, you can miss something. Because five minutes can go by and it's like, oh, your, your, your bleeder got defeated. Game over. And it's like, what? I didn't even know he was being attacked because you missed one message. That doesn't happen anymore because now they'll freeze the game and be like, hey, assist this guy at once. If he dies, you're going to, you're going to lose. So they'll freeze a game for a few seconds.

[00:19:46] So they know that you saw it and that, you know, that you're supposed to do that, which is good. I think that's good. I don't think that's too handholdy. They're just making sure that you don't miss anything super duper important like that. Because again, before you could. So, um, yeah, I think, I, I, I think that's about it. Shit. The butt rock. Can we talk about the butt rocket? I love, I love that. They still do like eighties stale hair metal riffs.

[00:20:14] And just, I love that over the top shit. It's dynasty warrior origins, not dynasty warriors. We're trying something new. They kind of are, but not really. Well, Steve, I remember, uh, if you've been with this show the entire time, you remember our second episode ever put up on this feed was me and Steve talking about the dynasty warriors movie. That was on Netflix. And I think I did praise in that, in that review, Steve, the, the butt rock, they retained the butt rock. It was so good. It was great.

[00:20:44] Excellent. God, it was, it was great. I know it was, we were surprised that so many people shit on it. We loved it, but shit, I guess, I guess we're just here for that kind of stuff. Yeah. I guess that's about it. Dynasty warriors origins honestly is like the rare game that accomplishes its goal of like widening its audience and being more accessible to everybody. Without losing its old audience, without pissing everybody off or losing its sense of self.

[00:21:12] It retains everything good about dynasty warriors and gets more people in the fold. And it's, it's fantastic. Uh, all I got to say is samurai warriors origins. When please, because samurai warriors is the thing I love the most. It's the series I love the most. So samurai warriors origins win, but other than that, yeah, dicey warriors origins, giant thumbs up for me.

[00:21:48] All right. Andre, it's pretty impressive that you're talking about a game that just came out. That's pretty neat. That's pretty neat. Very forward, very forward thinking of you. How about, how about, uh, kick it up a notch by talking about a game that's not out yet. Oh, tell us about it. In a ninja five.

[00:22:09] Oh, you might remember a year ago, Kevin wasn't here and me and Andre would just decide to talk about, uh, Konami putting rocket night adventures and Felix, the cat just letting limited run play with their shiny new carbon engine. And then they were all like, we got a secret third thing we're working on. We'll let you know what it is at the end of the month. And we were speculating what it might be. Ooh, it might be this. Ooh, it might be that. And they're like, it's ninja five. Oh. And we were like, oh, that's neat.

[00:22:41] Yeah. We were kind of non plus. I was like, that's cool, but that's not really what I thought I would hear, but okay. I've never played it before and almost no one has because it's one of those games. That's more famous for being worth fat stacks on eBay. And yes, finally releasing at the end of the month. So why am I talking about it right now when no one else even has this version yet? I bought the game physically unlimited run games.com, whatever it is.

[00:23:10] And they sent the game to my house. So why wait for some hoity toity reviewer who's never, you know, even seen a Game Boy Advance before to possibly lead you astray when I'm right here, you know, putting my money on. I don't know where my mouth is. I could tell you how this video game is. That's crazy. So they sent out those copies before like other ones. That's fucking awesome, actually. So you was it a mistake though?

[00:23:37] Are like, are the Pinkertons going to show up at your house and demand Ninja five? Mine's not the only one. A bunch of people got it. Last year they actually sent us the Plumbers Don't Wear Ties super deluxe whatever edition a month in advance too. But what a treat. Yeah, I wasn't going to talk about that on the air because. Well, yeah, we let's not get canceled. But also, yeah, you got so you're getting to play this quote unquote early, even though it's an old game.

[00:24:05] I feel like this is a we need to have our voice guy do like fine time exclusive or some shit like that. Man, I should have been prepared. So anyway, there are the expected, you know, a handful of them, you know, perks to getting this bespoke version versus archiving it. You get the neat looking animated cut season season. Open and cut scene. And you can either play Ninja five.

[00:24:34] Oh, or the European counterpart Ninja cop or all Ninja cops bastards. I mean, probably what? It's called Ninja cop in Europe. Yeah, it's not called anything in Japan because there even Konami was like, nah, Japan doesn't get this. So my favorite option in here, you could play with enhanced sound. So no more GBA crunch if you don't want it. Oh, good. That's always a good thing. That is the most worthy upgrade they could do.

[00:25:03] So enough futzing around with, you know, the bells and whistles they added. What's this game like? Honestly, it's pretty neat. You're Ninja five. Oh, and in the tradition of our show, this is now his name in the absence of a real one. Absolutely. And you get involved in what could be best described as scenarios five in all three levels in a boss in each scenarios. Jeez. Look who's getting, you know, pretentious. Just say levels. Yeah, jackass.

[00:25:31] Well, it's not really Ninja Gaiden or Shinobi. You get some manner of briefing and the start of these, they're all kind of fuzzy looking. I think they were trying to go for like photos being sent to you, but it's Game Boy Advance. So, you know, that's still being crunched. It's funny looking. They were trying to do a thing. I appreciate the effort. Yeah. And they all entail mostly saving hostages and, you know, or attempting to, at least in self-contained areas.

[00:25:58] You got a sword, an infinite amount of shrukens that can be upgraded to another kind of projectile if you play well enough. And honestly, they kind of make the game almost easy, too easy at points. And your grappling hook. And that's your whole kit. Make the most of it. Because honestly, I've had the movement to be very curious. It's almost like a relic of cinematic platformers, but also not in a way.

[00:26:25] Ninja 5-0 has what could be best described as a ninja shimmy. As his default stride, he's not like running like Ryu or Joe do. He moves at a good pace. It's not like sun stops, but it looks weird in action. It feels fine, but it looks strange. I'm trying to imagine a ninja walking, just like strolling. You know what I mean? Yeah. That would be weird.

[00:26:55] Like on his day off from Ninja. Yeah. Yeah. Just walking. Yeah. Just getting some green onions and, you know, rutabaga at the store there, looking at the produce, squeezing the, you know, melons. I don't know. We're not getting that from Ninja 5-0. He does the ninja shimmy. He ducks. He hangs on ledges. He has the grappling hook, which is a big part of the game. It latches on to just about everything. And it becomes instrumental to, you know, navigating everywhere and combat because you can use it to throw

[00:27:23] things, but not stab things, which is an important distinction to make, because Lord help me. I fucked that up at the bazillion times. Stealth is also fairly important and can be good for, you know, saving your own health bar, because if you're able to sneak behind people, they won't react. It's not like Ninja Gaiden where everything's trying to kill you all the fucking time. So, you know, there's a lot of, you know, consideration that went into this, which is weird that all the scenarios are what they are.

[00:27:52] Levels end when you go through the red door with the red key. So you don't have to save all the hostages to save levels, but you do need to attempt to save them. Which is like, like you have to make an attempt. So what happens if you just get the key and just go to the door and then that's it? Like it won't let you. It says, the game just says, no, go, you're missing hostages.

[00:28:15] There's no going to the end and going, reporting back to superiors going, oh, geez, I couldn't save all the hostages. You know how it is. Oh, darn. Because for a while I was doing good saving hostages, but after a while they started dropping like flies. Like I couldn't save all of them, but you're really getting the hostages for points, really. So you just gave up on them after a while?

[00:28:39] No, I didn't give up because some of them do drop, you know, health and whatever, but it's not necessary. As long as you, as long as a hostage is dead or alive, it counts and you get to leave, you get to finish a level. Okay. That's so weird. All right. Almost like mercenary Kings. I don't know if you ever played that game. Yeah. Yeah. Very similar. Yeah. Sausages. Okay.

[00:29:05] I know I keep bringing up Ninja Gaunt or Shinobi, but at the end of these, each scenario, there's a boss that feels like it didn't make to either one of these games, which is weird in itself. Because if you have the level three projectile, which goes from Shrukens to fireballs to here's an angel laser. Pew, pew, pew. It's almost like laser. Yeah. Yeah. It's the best way I can describe it. It's like, okay, you just stand here and don't get hit. And, oh, look, the boss died.

[00:29:35] Mission accomplished. Select the next scenario. You lost all your shit, but I'm sure you can get level three projectiles again soon enough. It's, it's a weird game. There's a weird difficulty spike toward the end and maybe I'd complain about it, but honestly, it's a, it's a, it's just Nintendo hard in the early hours. You know, you're playing for points. They're encouraging little speed run time trial things. It's going to be available in a few weeks.

[00:30:04] And if you were curious back then about, oh man, like I was like reading about it in Nintendo power going, oh, this looks neat. Then you never bought it. Like go get it. It's going to be on all the door stores, the store fronts in a few weeks. Door fronts. Would they just throw it in your lawn? Like a newspaper of old. Just here's a ninja pipe. Oh, just throw it like a shuriken into your lawn. Sticks in there. I remember this game for some reason from like IGN Game Boy or something like that.

[00:30:33] Like one of those IGN, you know, when they were like fairly separated sites, you know, I remember like them kind of being like this game is so cool. I remember like the IGN review. I think that's a weird way to remember Ninja five. Oh, but that's, I mean, we played that Castlevania game on Game Boy on our NSO show and that was terrible. And that's also worth a few hundred dollars. Jesus. Of all the things you could spend a few hundred dollars on Ninja five. Oh, is considerably better. And you don't have to in a few weeks.

[00:31:04] Oh, boy. That is just I mean, you got you guys know me. I don't really look at the prices of physical games, but just like if you're going to pay some scum sucker hundreds of dollars for a game, please make it better than Ninja five. Oh, not that there's anything wrong with this game, but like at least make it a, you know, TurboGrafx CDE's game or something. Maybe that's just me. Buy what I want. OK, don't spend the money on what you want. Buy the thing that I care about that.

[00:31:31] I do love that some dickhole is sitting on like 30 copies of Ninja five. Oh, and just lost his his investment. Love it. Couldn't happen to a better person. Yeah, that's very positive. Yeah. Love it. All right, guys. Kevin, you got you. Did you play anything? You just going to I don't I don't play video games. OK, I understand that. I have a quick thing that talk to Kevin about because Pokemon TCG pocket started trading today. And there's a reason I didn't initiate a trade with you.

[00:32:01] Which did hurt my feelings. Yes. And I'm sorry about that. And that's because the game only lets you trade with only one friend at a time. Yeah, there's well, I mean, I went through because I want to do one trade just for the sake of doing it. But the amount of cards that I had to destroy so I could trade for like one one star card. Yeah. I don't know. I think it's definitely bad enough they're going to have to change that because nobody's going to want to fucking use it like it is.

[00:32:28] I love that this game about trading cards with your, you know, you know, ostensibly with other people. It was like does not let you do that. Bullshit. It was a sad day today. All right, guys. Well, you know what we got to do? We got to wash it off in the shower. I know Kevin's feelings were hurt. Steve, you inadvertently hurt them. I know it wasn't really your fault. But I think, you know, let's do it. Yeah. Steve gets his loofah out of the warmer.

[00:32:56] I'm sure I can find forgiveness from my hurt feelings. He has it in a low oven. Just like just waiting. I think I think I think the loofah warmer might be a little bit more organic. What do you guys like? Do you like guys like a really hot shower? Do you like kind of lukewarm? Kind of like just medium hot or just hot in the winter, cooler in the summer? Yeah. Medium hot. Not like skin burning, but it's good. I don't want to feel it a little.

[00:33:26] Yeah. Even if I'm like super cold from going outside, I don't like a blazing ass like super hot shower, you know, like maybe just like for a second to warm up. And then, you know. But yeah. Okay. We'll figure it out. We'll fiddle with the knobs. I'm sure we can find something that'll work for all three of us at the same time. We'll be right back. It's time to hit the showers.

[00:34:33] That was perfect. That was like a that was like Goldilocks. Not too not too hot. Not too cold. Perfect shower. I must say. Steve and I reestablished our bond. Yeah. I'm glad you guys did. So usually we get out of the shower. We do a little taste test. We usually eat a little snacky something this time we do have a taste test of a different variety. We can't eat it, but we definitely will taste it. And that will be switch cartridges.

[00:35:03] None of us have ever done this before. You guys remember when the switch first came out, it was kind of a viral thing. It's like, oh, have you licked the cartridge? It tastes bad. And everyone does on camera. It's like, oh, yeah, it really does taste bad. I have never done this because I've never found anyone to do this with me. But we promised on the air after switch two was announced, we will lick the cartridges on the air. And now we are here to pay up on that because we are men of the people. We are a show of the people.

[00:35:33] We are going to lick the switch cartridges. But I figured we should look two different ones because like if we look an old one, does that taste the same as a new one? We don't know. Right. Right. So what we decided to do is that we're going to lick two cartridges each. We're going to all lick a fairly new game and then we will all lick an old game. Okay. So that's what we're going to do. So that's the premise. So let's start with the new game first. Or should we do old? What do you guys think? I think we should do old first. Really? Yeah, I mean.

[00:36:02] Because I think new. I don't know. Let's go in order. Old. Old? Okay. We'll do old first. I'm glad you clarified we're just licking these and not eating them because I'm very committed to the show and I was prepared to eat my game. Oh, no. Mine came from a deluxe edition of Breath of the Wild. So, no, I'm not eating this cartridge. Don't say the name yet. We're supposed to go round table and say what the games are. God. Fine. Okay. Steve's licking Breath of the Wild. Jeez.

[00:36:33] I don't know why I'm being so upset about this. Okay. For my old game, I'm going to like Ultra Street Fighter 2, the final challengers. That's what I'm going to do. I'm more surprised you own that game. I figured for sure you'd be like, I'm not playing that $40. No, early in the Switch. Early in the Switch's life, up and through mid-2018, I pretty much bought physical just because I only have like a 32 gig card. And I didn't really have the space to download everything. No, I just meant in general that you would buy that game.

[00:37:02] Nah, I was interested. I always liked the HD remix on 360 and this is basically that, but better. So, but yeah, anyway, yeah, I have Ultra Street Fighter 2, the new challengers. You have Breath of the Wild, Steve. Kevin, what are you looking for your old game? I picked Splatoon 2 based on how like bright and colorful it is, which makes me think it's going to taste better than your games. Really? Okay. Yeah. Okay, let's do it. No time like the present. Let's open these up. I haven't played this game forever.

[00:37:32] Hope it doesn't. It's been a few. Should we look the back, right? Like above the. Yeah, yeah. Okay. Well, you want to look the label. No. Do we, is there any concern that the old games have lost their flavor? See, that's what I see. Yeah. See, that's what I'm thinking. I'm thinking they have. So when we compare to the new game, I think it's going to taste different, but that's my personal theory. Steve, what do you think? Well, it's not like we were manhandling them the whole time. They were mostly in the game system or in the case. So I don't think they should be too bad. We'll find out.

[00:38:02] Okay. All right, guys. No time like the present. Let's lick the cartridge. Here we go. Oh, that's bad. Oh, Jesus Christ. That's terrible. See, I don't think mine is that bad. I feel like mine. It's there. Oh, that's terrible. I'm drinking this water. Oh, that's really bad. It's still on my tongue. Ah, Jesus Christ.

[00:38:31] I wasn't expecting it to be that bad. That's like earwax. You ever taste earwax by accident? It's like earwax times a thousand. I've never tasted earwax by accident. It's the most bitter thing you don't. It's the most bitter thing you could have. Okay. Have you ever smelled earwax that it tastes like it smells? I didn't. I didn't. I thought earwax didn't have a smell. That was. Oh, guys. Steve, that was bad, right? Like.

[00:39:00] It is still on the tongue. I think I need to grab a quick Dorito to. Yeah. Maybe I need to eat something else. I need a cracker or something. I'll be right back. This isn't part of the taste test. This is just a Ritz. Everyone knows what Ritz tastes like. But I got to eat something. Jesus Christ. Yeah, I don't know. I think I really do. Mine didn't seem that potent. Oh, that was terrible. Yeah, I did moderately better than a chip.

[00:39:28] I realized I had some Spanacopa to line around. So. Who just has Spanacopa lying around? Oh, I got it on purpose for snacking. But, you know. Oh, my God. That's just like. I just have that here. It's like. Hagar punches the barrel. Spanacopa comes out. Just no big deal. In retrospect, the, you know, the fairly mild feta is actually a good palate cleanser. Okay.

[00:39:58] Now I'm scared to try this again. That was so bad. Ugh. Okay. Let's try the new game, shall we? What is our new game? All right. I'm going to taste for my new word game. I'm going to taste Fire Emblem Warriors Three Hopes. What do you got, Steve? I have Mario and Luigi brothership. All right. Kevin? I'm going to sample Zelda Echoes of Wisdom. All right. That sounds good. Okay. Let's open these up.

[00:40:30] Purple. I like the. I like the purple and kind of pinkish red scheme of Fire Emblem Warriors Three Hopes. This is a really good art style. They got the, you know, the brothers and their new friend on the white backdrop, like the other cartridges used to. Okay. On here. All right. I'm not taking as big a lick this time. That was too much on my tongue. I'm taking a little lick this time. Okay. You guys ready? Yeah. Let's do it.

[00:40:59] Oh, that's not as bad. That's actually not as bad. Yeah. I'm still not looking these on purpose, but it's less potent. The old one knows worse. Kevin seems confused. I feel like I've missed out. You know, my. Yeah. This, this one is as mild as Splatoon 2. Yeah. I want it. I want something nasty. That will. You come over here and lick my Ultra Street Fighter 4. That was fucking gross. You come over here and lick my Ultra Street Fighter 4.

[00:41:28] I love that you said Ultra Street Fighter 4 and no one's going to bet. Ultra Street Fighter 2. But whatever. It doesn't matter. Come lick my Street Fighter. Come lick my kin masters. This was not lingering on the tongue like Breath of the Wild did. No, this is, this is definitely not as bad. That's Kevin is. I don't know. Maybe Kevin doesn't taste bitter or something. Yeah. I'm going to, I'm going to go lick more Switch games after we're done. Just because I need to know now.

[00:41:54] I, I, I never would have guessed that the consensus would have been that the old ones were more offensive than the new ones. I thought if anything, they had to have lost their potency. That's what I would have thought too, Steve. But no, the old one was way worse. I could see it. If you were holding it in your hand for a long time, like, you know, running it through your fingers and letting your finger greases do it and like eroding it away over time.

[00:42:20] But like I said, if it's just in your machine or in your case, it's not, I don't think it was going to affect much over time. We need to make sure that fine time is still a thing by the time the Switch three is announced so that we can then go back and revisit these same cartridges and find out if they've gotten even more potent. I'm going to, I'm going to lick a Ulster Shoe Fretter two in 2035 here and just see, see what happens.

[00:42:46] Oh, I sold off these very valuable licked fine time copies of. Do you have to declare that on eBay previously licked? You have to, you have to say that. If fine time gets real big someday, these might have some value from having our saliva on them. Oh yeah. The one Kevin's licked Splatoon 2 on the auction. It's like, it's like a signed thing, but it's, it's even, it's got our DNA.

[00:43:15] That's better than a signature. I gotta say. Let's talk about the actual Switch two announcement. Now that we're done looking, these disgusting cartridges. I know it was just kind of a teaser and wasn't really much to look out there, but I guess we can over speculate, under speculate, speculate, speculate. Anyway, Kevin, do you want to, whatever you want to say, you want to get us kicked off? What did you think of that? I got some assorted thoughts.

[00:43:42] Um, obviously I was glad to see something just because we've been waiting for, for so fucking long thinking it's coming at any moment. And I don't want to sound unappreciative, but I do wish that they did something a little bit closer to the reveal trailer for the first switch where there's, you know, rooftop parties and e-sports team Splatoon matches. And they kind of would give us like little glimpses here and there of like things that

[00:44:09] were like, kind of, you know, just like a quick snapshot of what we would find out later is Mario Odyssey, but you didn't get like a good look at it. And I'm also a little disappointed in the April 2nd event being specifically labeled as a direct. And I'm not saying, obviously I'm looking forward to it, but you know, the, I wanted them to be like, this is a presentation like they did for the first. And I kind of, I'm sure as a direct, they're not going to retain that live showcase thing.

[00:44:37] Um, and I think that's kind of a shame because that was just, I don't know, that was like such a special moment. Um, now I do, and I, and I know, I know we, we know what the switch to is. It's not as sure, not as, as you know, jaw dropping is seeing the switch for the first time and that's fine, but I just, I just wish they gave it maybe a little bit more pizzazz. Now this is, I'm sure this is a stretch, but I do, I just don't want them to go too far into the last thing worked well.

[00:45:06] So let's just like not touch anything to maintain momentum with the switch to, um, you know, and I don't, I don't want to get into talking about like comparisons with we do we you, but like, I'm just a little bit scared. There's a little bit specifically with the marketing. I don't want them to be too rigid with it. This was, it was so like, it felt a little sterile the first look at the, at the switch too.

[00:45:32] And, and I, and I'm not, I don't want to like overstep and be like, this is a concern at this point. I just hope it doesn't like turn into that too much specifically with the marketing. I understand that. I do understand that. But as the system too, it can feel like, okay, everyone goes, everyone says, we do we you. The thing for me that sticks out on my mind is DS to 3DS because that to me felt when they announced 3DS, I'm like, get the fuck out of here guys.

[00:46:02] What are you doing? You know what I mean? I was just like, what, okay, so a glasses list 3D screen, but it's like the same. I was like, fuck you. You know? So like, I mean, again, I was, I was kind of mad at the expound on that a little bit. Like, like why, what was, what was so offensive about DS to 3DS? What made you say, fuck you to the glasses list 3D? Because I was just like, is that all you got? You have the same system, but 3D now, obviously this doesn't switch 3D or something like that.

[00:46:29] I mean, it's like, it's, it's even more like the same than that. It's just that I was just like, man, come on. And then especially with like the first wave of software, it's like, okay. At the DS launch, we had like Super Mario 64 DS and then like Ridge Racer, which was essentially a port of Ridge Racer 64. Right? Okay. I get it. We're doing N64 ports. Guess what? 3DS comes out. We're still doing N64 ports. Here's Star Fox 3D. Here's Ocarina of Time 3D.

[00:46:59] Fuck you guys. You're still doing this? Like, get out of here. I don't know, man. It just, it hit me all the wrong ways. I guess we can't answer that question until we actually see the software for Switch 2 besides quote unquote new Mario Kart. But yeah, I was kind of like, you're not, you're not, nah, you're not getting my money for this. So no, Switch 2 didn't give me that feel. At least I can say. Steve, Steve's just looking around nervously. Like he just cannot believe the words.

[00:47:30] Look, I'm fine with iterative Nintendo this time. I really am. I mean, I know it's a mask. It's a handheld masquerading is both, but handhelds are what Nintendo really does. They, they gave up on really competing in the console space when GameCube was a very powerful lunchbox that didn't sell a bazillion units. Right? So yeah, I'm waiting for April direct with great anticipation. And yes, I really, really hated that. The only thing they showed off was new Mario Kart.

[00:48:00] Yes. Andre, this is a real game. I am waving my fine time bucks in the air right now that this is a real game. Is that okay? Because in an age without E3, I don't think Nintendo's wasting resources on things to show to the public that can't be sold. Especially since they had new old Donkey Kong in there. They knew that these two myths were going to be played again and again and again. They wanted us to see that. That is true. They did want us to see that.

[00:48:30] What did they show? Do you guys remember what they showed of Mario Odyssey? It was Toast Arena, right? With the giant ice crystals. I remember that. I don't remember any other scene though. I think it was just that. So yeah, they, they knew people were going to look at the bullet bill coming out of the wall or whatever. There was a shot in the desert, right? Yeah. It was Toast Arena. Oh, okay. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Sorry. When you said, you said the icicles, I was, yeah, I was. Yeah. Cause I remember the desert is frozen. Then you got to melt them. Then you can do. Yeah. Yeah.

[00:48:59] For the last point you made Kevin for like feeling too much the same thing. I did think it was weird that for years people were like, they don't need to change a thing. I just want switch. I want a more powerful switch. And then they give us exactly that. And then all the shit comes out. It's like, where is the innovation gone? Nintendo used to innovate. It's just like, what do you guys want? You just, you literally asked him for this for years. Now they're giving you exactly what you want.

[00:49:25] I understand a lot of it's like YouTube clickbait or whatever, but like Jesus Christ, like this is why a Nintendo fan always makes fun of other Nintendo fans. Cause they do shit like that. And I don't, I don't want to come off like that because I am happy for iterative Nintendo. Like I do will just want a more of the same, but more powerful and better. I just, I think the way I want it like presented with a little bit more pizzazz. I want the marketing to like be a little bit more intriguing.

[00:49:55] Like don't, I don't, I don't want them to be so upfront about like, you know, here are just some like CGI renders of the, you know, new joy cons. Yeah. And I gotta, and again, we're going to find out more about this when in on April 2nd, when we see the actual games and we see new Mario cart or whatever else they show. However, I'm going to say it again. I've said this a few times already on the show. I know people are coming out here and being like, Oh, if the switch too is like a PS4, that'd be great.

[00:50:24] That is not great. A handheld, like the PS4 is a steam deck. You have to be more powerful than a steam deck. I understand we had a member. We had that whole segment where we talked about like, it doesn't need to be afraid of like other handhelds, like PC handhelds. And I largely said they do not, but they do need to be more powerful. They have to. So I do hope that's the case. And that is something I hope I say at that presentation. I do like that.

[00:50:51] The, the joy cons are now like an insert instead of a rail. That's a really smart idea to me. Do you guys remember like there was an interview with either Yoshiaki Kizumi or Shinya Takahashi. One of them, it could, it couldn't even been a Nintendo minute or something like that, where they were talking about the original idea for switch joy cons was magnets, but the magnets kind of, they didn't stay all the time. So the system could just fall in your lap or worse yet on the floor. So, you know, that, that was a thing. So they did the rails, which are very secure.

[00:51:21] This looks like a revision of that old magnet idea. Only it's more of an insert. You're putting it kind of into the slots of the system there, which is cool. Yeah, that's about it. That's all I really had to say. There wasn't really much to go on on that, on that thing. But yeah, I liked old Donkey Kong. I like that people are freaking out. Oh, it's finally we're getting away from the rare shit. Finally.

[00:51:46] I do like that insert thing, but I am like, I really hope that doesn't wind up getting loose and becoming a bit of a failure point. I don't want to like feel flex on the sides of my joy cons after having the switch for a couple of years. I don't know. I feel like the rails held up pretty. Has anyone's rails ever snapped? I don't know. I feel like that's more secure. Yeah. So I'm sure that they've fucking thought about that a lot. If it didn't work good and it wasn't going to hold up, especially with all of like the Joy-Con drift issues they have.

[00:52:16] I feel like they want to make sure it's done right from the ground up. Yeah, I think they've obviously learned what worked and what didn't work with Switch. Including God, remember the part where they just showed like, hey, we don't have a shitty little kickstand. And now you could really, you could really like, because that's how I play. I'm a kickstand person. I like to set the thing down and hold the two Joy-Cons. That's how I always play outside of the house. So I never, I almost never play handheld.

[00:52:43] So that was a big deal to me seeing it like that. Okay. Those are a reasonable Switch 2 takes. You guys have any shitty takes? Any shitty Switch 2 takes? Kevin, I know you have one. I don't want to go first because I feel like I'm going to be wildly berated. I want to go last. Yours is the shittiest take though. Okay, fine. Okay, fine, fine, fine. I'll go first. Fine. I'll go first. I think it is clinically insane that it is called Switch 2. That is really stupid.

[00:53:12] I figured we were all just calling it Switch 2. Just like we called it Wii 2 before it was Wii U or whatever. Like we knew the next system. I cannot believe it's actually called Switch 2, Steve. I never thought that would actually be the name. Okay, well, one. Wait till Andre finds out what PlayStation has been doing. Fuck off. That's different. Andre, point one. There's no possible way you could confuse it now. And secondly, what were you going to call it?

[00:53:42] Anything, man. Nintendo. Super Switch? No, I. I. Okay. I. Shut up. Okay. First of all, I feel like I'm yelling at everybody and Kevin hasn't even said a shitty take yet. No, I just call it something else. You don't have to call it. I would have preferred that it didn't. It wasn't called Switch. Maybe that's terrible for marketing, but. I think Switch 2 is fine. I think they could have found something a little better that would have kind of invoked that

[00:54:12] Switch vibe and feeling where it was fairly clear that it was, it was a direct successor, but with a different, you know, what about like the Nintendo snap or like, like something that was like kind of along that like Switch and it doesn't, it doesn't, you know, I know that it needs to be the Switch because it switches into these different modes, but I think they could have like moved past that where the name doesn't necessarily have to directly

[00:54:38] relate to what it is physically doing and just had something more of the vibe of what the Switch is trying to like make you feel. Snap is really good. I like Nintendo snap. I don't think Steve does. It's not that I don't like it. It's just that. Well, what? What? Well, Nintendo Switch outsold PS2 here in North America finally. And who bought most of the things? Well, everyone that wanted to play Mario Kart 8 and what are they going to look? What are they going to see when they see snap?

[00:55:06] Are they going to see something that actually plays nice with their Switch one things? No, they're gonna be like Nintendo snap. I'll just stick with my Switch. Thank you. Yeah, you're right. I mean, I think you were right. That's why I said it is a marketing. I don't want to say a marketing nightmare, but it's definitely a challenge. Right. But there's no need for them to challenge themselves right now. So Switch 2 is what they should have done on a personal level. That is just I don't like it. That's not for me.

[00:55:35] You know, someone made the point in a video that they don't like the 2. The literally the font of the 2. And I agree with that. They have time to change that. I think it should. The 2 shouldn't look like that. It's kind of a boring 2. I think all the systems are made already and we're kind of stuck. No, they could. They probably haven't printed the facing the logos on them yet. They probably made all the screens. They have time to change 2. Okay. I'm holding out hope.

[00:56:05] I feel like that's a shit shittier take than the name. Okay. I don't know. Just for that, the whole back is just going to be a 2. It's not going to say Nintendo Switch on it at all. Just 2. Yeah. Okay, Kevin. I buffered you enough. Give me your shitty ass take. Yeah, Steve. Go ahead. What is your take, Steve? Oh, no, no, no, no. I want to hear yours. Are you what? You really want to go last? Fine. You know, I acknowledge. I acknowledge. Okay. Yeah. Okay.

[00:56:35] Steve, please. Fine. Fine. Fine. Let's swing it back to things they wanted us to see. You know, that part where they had the Joy-Con sliding around like little cars and then it's like, oh, look, it's Mario Kart 8. Well, a bunch of people were speculating that might mean their Joy-Con 2, for lack of a better term, might be makeshift mice. Well, you know what? I hope these speculations are 100% right. A lot of games came on the Switch that I thought they would never have, and they turned out

[00:57:04] pretty okay with touchscreen support or just, you know, adjustments to controls. But you know what? If Switch 2 came out the gate with mouse support, you know, not a stretch since Switch did get it very quietly eventually, and they publicized the hell out of it with, you know, some kind of mouse pro, for lack of a better word. And then Civilization 7 in the launch window. Holy fuck. I am there. New Phoenix right now with mouse support on Switch 2, right?

[00:57:33] Like, for sure. I think that would be great. It looks like it is. It looks like it has that not IR because it doesn't have that. Well, that's one thing that's missing. They don't have the IR thing from the left Joy-Con, which I didn't figure they would. The little mouse laser thing. Yeah. The only time I used that was Labo. It's the only time I've ever seen that thing used. I'm sure other things use it too, but yeah, it was that. No, I hope that is a thing.

[00:58:01] Now on Nintendo Switch Online, SimCity, SNES, now here you can use the mouse or something. I mean, sure, right? I can't see that getting good use all of the time, but in some rare cases, it could be real good. Yeah, and it's not like a thing that's too expensive. Like the IR thing, it's like, okay, if no one uses it, so what? It doesn't really cost much to put it in there, so you might as well just have it, right? It's one of those ideas.

[00:58:29] Okay, Kevin, you're out of room. You got to say it now. Tell the people. Okay, I have a bad take, and I acknowledge it is a bad take. Um, and I didn't even think about this until after the announcement. I was sitting on the couch playing my Switch and handheld, which I don't really do that often. And I was like, do I actually want something bigger than this? It feels good the way it is. I like looking at larger screens, as does everybody.

[00:58:59] But as far as usability, I don't know that it really needed to be bigger, even when I think about like traveling with the Switch. Obviously, it's not going in my fucking front pocket. But it, you know, I don't know if it's in the case. It goes in my bag. It doesn't take up too much space. It's not bulky. I would have been just fine. And I think, I think they're probably, I think because of the Steam Deck, right?

[00:59:24] Um, and because of a lot of the handheld PCs, there's probably a pressure to like make it bigger, make it bigger. I don't personally think it needed to be bigger than the Switches. It needed to have a smaller bezel than the original Switch, obviously. But form factor wise, the Switch is in a good place. Steve, I'm...

[00:59:49] Kevin, once the handheld stopped being able to fit in our pocket, the game's over. You just said we're putting it in a bag or a suitcase anyway. What's a few more inches? I mean, like even just... He's flustered. I almost fell over backwards in my chair. I don't know. Do my arms want to be held out that much wide? I don't know. I, I... Do you have a problem with your arms?

[01:00:18] The way it is. I don't... Maybe. This is such a horrendous take. This is so bad. I thought I was going to be really mad at you, but now I'm just disappointed. I'm so deflated by your take. I can't believe we fucking podcast with this guy. I just cannot believe the words that are coming out of your mouth. It is... That is nuts, dude. You want the Switch to be the same... Switch to be the same size as the original Switch? Go to fucking hell. Yes. All right. I would have preferred that. I, I'm... Wow.

[01:00:46] I'm not, I'm not boycotting the Switch 2 because I feel like it might be a little bit too large, but I think that it should have been left the way the Switch was. So I guess Kevin's holding out for another two years when Switch 2 light comes out. Too, too light, too furious. We're sitting here talking about Breath of the Wild 3 and he's just like sitting there, Oh guys, I, I don't know. I'm doing my second playthrough of Avowed finally.

[01:01:15] I just, you know, overplaying like, you know, Super Mario Jupiter or some shit. Am I the only, do you guys think I'm the only one that feels this way? Like, why does, why does everybody need it to be bigger? Can you not fucking see the Switch good enough? Bro, I, I think at the very least people were complaining about the size of the Joy-Cons and for that alone, it needed to be bigger. That was a big complaint at the Switch launch. Yeah, look, I have big hands, right?

[01:01:45] And like, and it's, it's like I said earlier, I do like to play with the two Joy-Cons in both of my hands in, in kickstand mode, right? That's how I like to play. I do like to hold the Joy-Cons. They're a little itty bitty, but I'm not most people, right? I get it. They're the little small. This will just give me the room to be like, Oh, that's what's so fucking good about the Steam deck. It feels so good in the hands. That's the main, that's the main reason why I don't play Switch handheld.

[01:02:11] I actually just don't like to hold it, but just doesn't feel great to me. The Steam deck does. And I'm not saying it's going to be as beefy as a Steam deck. However, those big Joy-Cons might make me actually do handheld more. And now with the new, it's not even a kickstand anymore. It's a whole fucking hinge. Like goddamn. And yeah, I want that shit to be bigger. I'm putting it on a goddamn table, Kevin. I can't like, I mean, Jesus Christ. I just, apocalyptically bad.

[01:02:39] Top five worst takes you've ever had on here. Easy. No doubt. If Nintendo comes out with an overpriced mouse that connects Bluetoothly and lets me play 7 on the table. Holy shit. Your people are never hearing from me again. Yeah. That'll be a case where I will play that. I will get that for Switch 2 specifically if I can play that way. Because I can't do that with Steam deck.

[01:03:03] I can probably Bluetooth a thing to the Steam deck, but then how do I get it to stay upright? Right? So. But yeah. I get that it's a bad take because I like to see larger screens. You can see it better. Just ergonomically, I don't know that I'm happy about the trade-off. I think we should move on. We've, we've, you've said enough. You said enough. Unbelievable. Fuck, I'm sorry. Can you believe we do a podcast with this guy?

[01:03:34] You know, it's great though. The next story is so fucking stupid that there's, it's like so much worse than my, my Switch 2 takes that I feel like I'll be redeemed. Oh yeah. Okay. Yeah. You guys want to be flabbergasted? Let's get flabbergasted even more right now. So a couple of weeks ago now, Jason Schreier skeeted the following, and I'm just going to read this verbatim.

[01:04:01] I quote, PlayStation has canceled two more live service games from subsidiaries Bend and Bluepoint. Bloomberg has learned. Fans have long wondered what Bluepoint has been working on for the last couple of years. I can report it was a live service God of War game. In quote. Now, typically this is the part of the show sheet where I will write some questions for

[01:04:30] the guys like guys, what the fuck? I just wrote a bunch of question marks here under questions. Cause I don't, I don't even know what, what do I even say? What do you even say? After I read that, I literally stared at my phone for like 10 seconds. I was like dumbfounded. Kevin, we've been talking about this since the Demon's Souls remake and we love the Shadow of the Colossus remake. We love, we love what Bluepoint has been doing shit. I mean, I hate it. Uncharted their ports to PS4 were immaculate, right?

[01:04:58] We've been wondering about this for so long. And this, this. Yeah. The thing, the thing is like a lot of these stories when, when it's a company doing something really fucking stupid, which this is really fucking stupid. It's like fun to like kind of laugh about it and talk about how stupid it is on the show. This, I was, I like, I was, I felt genuinely personally frustrated reading this. Even if Bluepoint was doing something, you know, similar to Uncharted.

[01:05:27] Let's say they were doing something that I don't care about playing. That's fine. I don't, I don't expect for them to like cater to my tastes, obviously, but not a fucking live service God of War game. Like we don't even, we don't need to explain why that's wrong. Like I, you could sit down and in five minutes make a list of a hundred different ideas off

[01:05:55] the top of your head that would be infinitely better than that. How does the thought process go literally? Like, okay. I understand. Well, okay. Well, first of all, I guess we should say, obviously this was perpetuated by Jim Ryan. When he got kicked out of PlayStation, Steve, we were like, yeah, it's obviously he's fucking this up. Even though PlayStation is on top. Why is he getting kicked out? That's for a reason. We kind of knew the reasons we are finding out more and more reasons.

[01:06:24] As time goes on here. This is one of those times where you just read a thing over and over again and go, I tactically recognize all these words in sequence, but I don't know what this means. God of War live service game. I know I'm a war recent God of War convert, but what? And Bluepoint. Bluepoint. Let's say you're the guy at the top.

[01:06:52] Oh, I know who will be good at making that. The guys who remake games. What in the fuck? How does those decisions? Look, we've covered so many bad corporate decisions on this show. That one, this one just baffles me because I literally do not understand how the synapses fire in your brain to make those decisions. Okay. This is what I'm going to have Bluepoint do. It just seems. I don't even know. I really don't know.

[01:07:20] Phil Spencer and Jim Ryan were drunk and having a super high stakes poker game. And it escalated from like, I'll throw my I'll throw my fucking $5,000 watch down. Like I'll throw sleeping with my wife down. I'll throw my fucking multimillion dollar mansion down. And then Phil Spencer was like, if I beat you, you got to fucking make Bluepoint do a God of War live service game. And Jim Ryan Lee drunkenly signed off on it. It's the only way this happened.

[01:07:48] Just incredible, man. Just I don't even know what to say. I know this is supposed to be a big question. I don't really have a question. All these bad decisions and Nintendo just quietly trotting in Metroid Prime 4 in two months. Like, hey, guys, it's finally done. Woo. I can't believe I was so like, not against you, but just I really didn't think that would be a Switch 2 game. Now it's painfully obvious it's going to be a cross generation game. Of course it is.

[01:08:18] I mean, it's been too long. Yeah, it has to be now. It's going to come out in both. But yeah. Anyway, yeah. I mean, see, I'm so depressed by this news. I'm already talking about fucking Metroid Prime 4 instead. Right. So maybe we should just move on. All right, guys. I have a just a random thing I think about sometimes. And I don't know how much you guys have ever thought about such a thing. But this is just something I think about from time to time.

[01:08:49] Do you think we will ever see another 2D fighter again? And I like 2D graphics. I don't mean like Street Fighter 6 is a 2D fighter. I mean like actual real deal hand-drawn 2D graphics from a real company. I'm sorry, indie companies. I didn't mean to slag you. But it's just, you know what I mean? Like if Capcom Steve made like Darkstalkers and it was straight up two-dimensional, do you

[01:09:17] even think that's like a possibility in this day and age? Well, I'd be fucking dead from excitement if it happened. So no, of course they wouldn't be nice enough to do that for me. Wait a second. Are you saying like you would actually prefer that or something? Or because I don't ever usually agree with when people say that. But I think in the case of like specifically Darkstalkers, I might actually agree with you. I don't know.

[01:09:44] I always see the Morgan Miles when they stuck her in, you know, the versus game. Just I mean, I'm remembering Tatsunoko versus Capcom in particular. Like, oh, she don't look right here. Yeah, it was weird 3D on that system. It wasn't, you know, they did the best they could. But, you know, yeah. There's some, I don't know. Some characters in Tatsunoko look really good. Like, I don't know. I think Ryu, I think like the Street Fighters and stuff look good.

[01:10:14] A lot of them. Other ones are like. A lot of them do. But when you have that horror gothic thing, it just lends itself to hand drawing more. It sure does. I think the Tatsunoko characters come off way better in Tatsunoko versus Capcom. I think the Capcom characters suffer a little. Yeah. Yeah. Because it just lends it to the art style. So, Kevin, I know you don't play fighting games. But what do you think? Like, do you what do you think about the idea of like a major company nowadays like Capcom

[01:10:44] or S&K or whatever pouring that much money into a true blue like 2D game? Yeah, I definitely do not. I don't think about fighting games near as much as you guys are really at all. I want to answer your question with a question back to the two of you. And I don't ask this with a bias or like feel one way or the other, but just like genuinely.

[01:11:09] Do you guys think with kind of modern advancements in game design? I mean, obviously, there's there's like there would be an aesthetic value to doing a game like that. Do you think that they're that they would be able to do something like really exciting mechanically or gameplay wise that 2D fighting games of the past didn't do for one reason or another? Um, I don't think so.

[01:11:37] I think it would just be purely cosmetic, Steve. I'm not thinking of any gameplay thing. No. Yeah, Andre's pretty much right. But who knows? Maybe, uh, you know, we got the Capcom verse set to come in real soon. Maybe they're building up to Capcom verse SNK three. And we're doing self-fulfilling prophecy right now. And that will be hand drawn. And we'll see we'll see what it could really bring to the table.

[01:12:08] I don't think they will do that game had. Well, because like, here's the thing. Marvel Marvel versus Capcom 4 is absolutely happening. That's 100% happening. We know it. So like that, like maybe, maybe I don't see like a potential CVS three being being that way. But maybe something, again, like a Darkstalkers or something that wouldn't be as popular. I don't think it's likely, but I don't think it, the chance is not zero. Basically is what I'm saying.

[01:12:38] It is a, there is a non-zero chance of that happening. But yeah, that's just something I think about from time to time. It would be cool. This is your mind on fine time. I'm sick. Hey, Debbie. I'm sick.

[01:13:27] I'm sick. I'm sick. All right. I've had enough crackers. I have stuffed to the brim with crackers. That is my dinner for the night. All right. We're going to play a game as we often do on the show. We have a little quiz game for the guys, but Kevin, you had something first. I want to ask Steve a question. Going back to 1995. How old were you in 1995, Steve? Like nine-ish? Eight.

[01:13:57] Okay. So knowing, and I don't, I want to call you an animation snob in the most respectful and polite way possible. Knowing how much, how near and dear to your heart hand-drawn animation is. I am curious how you felt when Toy Story came out about, about computer animation and, you know, a, how you felt about that movie specifically, if you felt optimistic or if, or if you were

[01:14:27] resentful towards it. And I guess also looking forward, what did you think was going to happen long-term with computer animation like that? It's a great question. That is a great question because when it came out, it was just fairly exciting looking. We'd never saw anything quite like it before. I know it looks dated now, especially even just looking at Toy Story one versus Toy Story three, what Pixar learned and got better tech over the years.

[01:14:53] There's a world of difference, but seeing it back then, it was very interesting, very exciting at the, at the time we, I loved it. I still like Toy Story to translate eight year old Steve thoughts like, well, I guess. There'll be movies like this sometimes now, and that will be okay. And not, this is definitely going to take over everything and ruin it forever, whether it works or not.

[01:15:19] Do you, do you, do you look at Toy Story with a slight resentment in hindsight because of that, because that was kind of like what kicked all of it off? No, I, I think what I really would really blame it on is I don't want to call it stupid people, but a lot of stupid people will. And I, and I've seen this happen in, well, not seen it happen, but I've been to a Disney world a number of times.

[01:15:48] Sometimes one time was, uh, right before a great movie, right? And what they call Disney Hollywood studios now closed. It's a, it's basically a little tour of, Oh, movies through the years. Ah, how fun, exciting. It's, it was like a, it's a centerpiece for the park and it was dumb that they got rid of it. And there was a guy taking surveys for, you know, what, what you've seen lately, what do you want to see? And I asked him point, like, why are they getting rid of this thing?

[01:16:17] Well, people feel it's too old fashioned. And I wanted to say, well, that's the dumbest thing in the world. But I remember another time where a hundred one Dalmatians, the Disney plus has all the older movies on streaming available. So we're sitting there with my niece and I'm hearing my brother-in-law's mother. She's saying too, you know, this looks kind of outdated, doesn't it? And I'm like, I guess this really is a way people think.

[01:16:45] No, that's not surprising. So if anything, I'm more resentful of that kind of backwards thinking more than toy story existing. I want to ask a follow-up question to that. Um, kind of the same question, um, how you felt at the time and then how you feel in retrospect, but about Shrek, because I think of Shrek as kind of being the second turning point where now it's been established that like there, there's no light at the end of the tunnel for hand-drawn animation.

[01:17:14] I think everybody knew kind of from Shrek on that this is the predominant way that we watch animation. Um, and if you like have any, any like resentment towards Shrek maybe, or at the time did. I didn't resent Shrek at the time. I still don't resent Shrek, but Shrek was also a movie I liked exactly one time. Cause even back then, like, okay, this isn't Disney.

[01:17:40] We're going to start pouring on them fart jokes a lot. And I remember even it was either me or our cousin that got the VHS for Christmas and we had it on like in the background, like, I don't remember it being this like this for Christmas. And I just never gave too much thought to Shrek again. And I did see other Shreks and it was just, that just was more than the animation of that

[01:18:09] was just doing a lot of the more pop culture referencing, pandering to like Shrek two is well, not just Shrek two. Everyone was doing the whole bullet time thing. Cause matrix just came out. Ooh, we got to show everybody that we also know how to stop a camera in the middle of a fight. Ah, Ooh, ah, real impressive shit. You guys. But no, no, like, um, you didn't have any strong thoughts at the time about like feeling

[01:18:37] like now computer animation is becoming too prevalent or predominant. No, I don't, I don't have a dartboard with Shrek's face on it that I, that I, that I throw knives at going fucking Shrek ruined all the, the hand-drawn frozen concept. Now they, now no one will just let it go. Especially me. I've never seen a Shrek. I guess I should never, huh? I should just keep it that way. What are you talking about?

[01:19:06] It's the best way to listen to a all-star. It is so weird that millennials now associate smash mouth with Shrek. That is so fucking bizarre. I mean, I get it. It was part of the soundtrack, but like to have that strong association, like the way people associate the offspring with crazy taxi now, it's just, I don't know those kinds of, I mean, it's not, there's nothing wrong with that, I guess, but it's, to me, it's just, I can't imagine. But Andre, you need to understand all of the Shrek started with all-star for no reason.

[01:19:36] Okay. All of them. Every single last one of them? Not the poos, the poos, the puss in boots ones, but the ones that say Shrek in the title all start with it. Okay. Weird. I'm glad you feel this way. I, I'm, I'm glad that it, especially with Toy Story, cause I think Toy Story is, is special. Um, and I'm glad that it didn't, it's not like tainted and you don't like correlate it in your head with like the downfall of hand-drawn animation.

[01:20:06] I think the only thing I could add here is that, um, going back to what Steve was saying about, uh, people thinking of it as old fashioned, the 2d animation, we did the same shit in video games, man. It's, it's something that's really hard to explain to a younger person about why Sonic disappeared through the second half of the nineties on Saturn and whatnot, because it's like, well, why didn't they just make Sonic four? Why didn't they just make another? It's like, they don't seem to understand that they could not do that.

[01:20:35] Sega could not do that. They would get destroyed if they did that against Mario 64 and crash bandicoot and fucking crock and Spyro. If they came out here with just another 2d Sonic, they would have gotten killed and rightfully so quite honestly, that's cause that's just not where we were at at that time. And that's, you know, we, we weren't like looking to kill 2d animation in 1995 at the

[01:21:03] same time as the nineties went on. It feels like, yeah, stuff like Tarzan and whatever were big hits, but it, it definitely wasn't the same kind of hits as like the lion King or Aladdin, right? Like it was popular, but not like that. I think symphony of the night's a good, good example of whether, you know, I know you guys are maybe don't feel that great about it, but I think nobody gave a shit at all of the time. And a lot of people look at that game as being a masterpiece in retrospect. So. Yeah. Yeah. That's exactly it.

[01:21:31] People saw 2d people were looking way more forward to castle. St. Vania 64. Like I promise you that was the case. Symphony of the night didn't even register Steve. Well, I like symphony and then I much more than 64, but listen back to our episode that I don't remember the title right now where I tear apart Tarzan for being a piece of shit. I don't know why he has such a hard on against Tarzan. I don't know why, man. It's weird.

[01:21:58] It's very, listen, I'll be nice to it for a second. Okay. Because if you put it on mute and you turn on the subtitles, it's much better. That's not the, yeah, that the very good compliment, Steve. Excellent. Very, very good thing to say about Tarzan. Fine time. Fine time. Fine time. Okay, guys, you ready to play a game? I don't think, have we played a game this year yet? Shit. I don't think we played them. I don't think so. Yeah. Come on. It's time for a game.

[01:22:25] As per usual, I do not know what to call this game. So I'm going to call it the Nintendo switch guessing game. Whoa. Who? You guessed stuff. Majestic music makes up for the mediocre name. Thank you. We don't have to taste anything anymore, do we? No, we don't have to taste any more cartridges.

[01:22:53] However, we might talk about a couple games that we tasted. Maybe. So here's what I want to do. Do you guys remember some months ago, we did a thing where I gave you a switch game and I said over under 3 million copies. I think we did other games too, but the 3 million was the number, right? So I thought it was fun when we did that, but I want to switch it up a bit. This is also about sales, but now we're going to pit two games against each other.

[01:23:19] So I'm going to name two switch games and you're going to tell me which one sold more. How about that? Oh, that's really good. All right. Which one sold more? Maybe that should be switch. Which one sold more? Still a little on the nose, but the music's great. Okay. Thank you. That is slightly better than the other title. Thank you, Strider. Thank you, Capcom. Don't sue us. I feel like this is fair use. All right.

[01:23:49] So, okay. Let's just get started. Sorry. Are we working together to decide this? Yeah. No. I mean, I guess you could like, I don't know. Keep score if you want, but no, it's just a 50-50 game. So, okay. I don't know. It might be better if you go. Actually, it might be better if you work together. You guys have to. Yeah. Okay. You guys are going to work together. Yeah. You guys are going to work together. You guys have to come up with one answer. Okay. One answer. Here's our game.

[01:24:17] I want you guys to decide which one sold more. New Super Mario Brothers U Deluxe or Super Mario 3D World plus Bowser's Fury. Which one sold more? Oh, man. I think Bowser's Fury. I think that one, too. I think that had COVID behind it. I think 3D's just got more appeal. So, you guys are in consensus on this? Super Mario 3D World plus Bowser's Fury?

[01:24:47] Yes. Yeah. Okay. Let's lock it in. Super Mario 3D World plus Bowser's Fury sold 13.4 million copies. That is less than Mario U Deluxe. That sold 17.7 million copies. Guys, got it wrong. God damn. All right. Well, okay. That's just one. Let's set up the next one. Nintendo Switch Sports or Ring Fit Adventure?

[01:25:17] Which one sold more? Nintendo Switch Sports or Ring Fit Adventure, guys? Come to a consensus. That's got to be Ring Fit Adventure, right? Because of COVID? Ring Fit Adventure had a very long tail. Yeah. Ring Fit Adventure. Really? Really? Okay. Yeah. It did take off during the Rona for sure. But okay. Ring Fit Adventure. Let's lock it in.

[01:25:42] Ring Fit Adventure sold 15.3 million copies, which is more than Nintendo Switch Sports, but it's not by much. Nintendo Switch Sports has sold 14.3 million copies. So, it's close. All right. Air high five, Steve. Smack. Fuck yeah. There. I'll do it for you. You guys, I don't know. Actually, not you guys. It's just Kevin who was always surprised by the sales of Nintendo Switch Sports for some reason, right? Like, you're always like, why do a lot of people have this? I really didn't feel like anybody gave a shit when that came out. Like, I really didn't.

[01:26:12] I don't know. Yeah. All right. Next game. Metroid Dread or Arms? Metroid Dread or Arms? Which one sold more? I know Arms did okay, but not that okay. And I think Metroid Dread is the best-selling Metroid, which also isn't a huge number. Yeah, which isn't saying much.

[01:26:42] I want to say Metroid Dread. Okay. I think personally, I probably would have went with Arms, but I don't feel strongly about it, so I'll side with Steve. Okay. So, Steve's driving the car here. You guys are going to say Metroid Dread? Let's lock it in. Metroid Dread sold a touch over 3 million copies, which is more than Arms 2.7 million copies. So, yes.

[01:27:11] Metroid Dread sold more. You guys got it. That's why we let Steve drive the car. All right. Beep. Beep. Beep, motherfucker. Beep. Next game. Octopath Traveler or Xenoblade Chronicles Definitive Edition. Of course, we're just counting the switch sales for Octopath Traveler here. So, that or Xenoblade Chronicles Definitive Edition, guys. What do you think?

[01:27:39] I know the arts I've seen for Octopath Traveler, but those stopped after a touch. Do you remember what the number was? Two. Okay. So, basically, what you're saying is, do you think Xenoblade Chronicles sold more or less than 2 million copies, Kevin? I would guess less, but I don't feel strongly about this one either. No confidence today. No, no.

[01:28:09] I have moderate confidence that Xenoblade Definitive Edition sold more than Octopath 1 on Switch. Okay. Final answer? Kevin, will you say in the car? All right. Xenoblade. In the car. You're right, Steve. Octopath Traveler did sell over 2 million copies at 2.1 million. However, that is more than Xenoblade's 1.8 million copies.

[01:28:38] So, yeah. Xenoblade. Octopath sold more on Switch than Xenoblade Chronicles. All right. That's close, though. A lot of these are close. You know? I wanted to pick ones that are close. Maybe that can be a hint then, going forward. Most of these are close. All right. Next game. Big Brain Academy. Brain vs. Brain. Brain or Princess Peach Showtime. Which one sold more?

[01:29:06] I feel like I just read a JV title for some reason. I don't know why. Real. It's real. I was trying to stop myself from laughing. I don't know why that was funny. Yeah. Big Brain Academy or Princess Peach Showtime, guys. Which one sold more? I want to say Princess Peach Showtime, I think, specifically because it was, like, you know, kind of trailing on the success of the Mario movie. Okay.

[01:29:32] Yeah, based on Mario, I'll say Peach, too. Okay. Y'all in consensus? Let's lock it in. Big Brain Academy's 1.9 million copies is more than Princess Peach Showtime's 1.3 million copies. So, yeah. I would not have guessed that Big Brain Academy would have been pushing 2 million. I wouldn't have thought that either, honestly. Well, you know what?

[01:30:02] It's not even that I thought it would sell 2 million. I would have guessed Showtime to be more like 3 or 4. I would have thought it would have been a lot more than that. I guess the word of mouth was not great. It certainly wasn't great from us. So, uh... I wouldn't have been surprised with Peach at 2 million and Big Brain Academy at, like, you know, 1. Yeah. That name still carries panache, though, Steve. Big Brain and, like, what's the other one? Train Your Brain. Brain Age. Brain Age, yeah.

[01:30:30] I think those names are still well-known enough. So, yeah. All right. Next game. New Pokemon Snap or Yoshi's Crafted World? Which one sold more? New Pokemon Snap or Yoshi's Crafted World, guys? What do you think? New Pokemon Snap did okay, but not good for a Pokemon game. So...

[01:30:58] Remember people bitched for years, we want a new Pokemon Snap, and then y'all didn't do shit. I bought the game day one. I did my part. Y'all didn't do shit. I posted my photos to social. I don't want to hear shit. Oh, man. I'm defaulting back to the Steve car for this one. Whatever he says, I'm going to go with. I have no... I don't have a... I'm going to say Yoshi had a head start, so that... Okay. That's a good strategy, honestly. But it is Pokemon.

[01:31:28] It didn't sell that much. I mean, for Pokemon. All right. Okay. So, Yoshi's Crafted World. Are we locking it in? Locking Yoshi. Your instincts were correct. Yoshi's Crafted World sold 3.3 million. New Pokemon Snap stalled at 2.7 million. That is super low, honestly. That shocked even me, so... What do you think went wrong there? Like, I just...

[01:31:58] I would have just... I don't know why that didn't sell more. They marketed it. I think it's one of those things where everyone says they want something, but they don't actually care. I think just people ask for Pokemon Snap forever, and they heard the cries, and they made one, and no one actually cares that much. I just feel without even the people that were, you know, allegedly asking for it, like, just the, like, concept of taking pictures of Pokemon would just sell.

[01:32:25] Just with kids, like, on a whim getting it for Christmas or whatever. Mm-hmm. Yeah, I don't know. It was so massively better than the first one, too. So... Yeah, it's... That's a weird one to me that will always be weird. Weird. All right, next game. Let's do two games that are not Nintendo games, two third-party games on Nintendo Switch, okay? These are just Switch sales, again.

[01:32:55] Stardew Valley or Minecraft. Which one sold more on Nintendo Switch, Stardew Valley or Minecraft? It's gotta be Minecraft. Okay. Stardew Valley was hot, but definitely not Minecraft. It's Minecraft. Minecraft. I want to... I know you're saying that these are close, but I would hazard a guess that they're not that close. Like, and again, I agree. I think Stardew Valley did numbers on Switch, but I think Minecraft...

[01:33:23] I think there's a larger margin than most of the games we put in that. I don't think Phil Spencer would go on the Xbox podcast to say, we made a lot of sales of Minecraft on Switch if it wasn't doing huge numbers. Okay, let's lock it in. Minecraft has sold 5.6 million copies on Switch. Now, before I reveal Stardew Valley, do you guys still feel good about your answer?

[01:33:52] I thought Minecraft would have been higher than that. I wouldn't have been surprised if we were pushing 10, to be honest. Me too. I would have thought it would have been higher, Steve. You still feel good about this? Still have to... Yes. Stardew Valley sold 7.9 million copies on Switch. God damn. Can you believe that shit? That's crazy to me. Good for them. I'm happy about that. Yeah, that's fucking nuts, man. Yeah, I just never... Yeah, I never...

[01:34:19] You outsold Minecraft on Switch alone. Not only did they outsell it, but that is a fairly large margin. Yeah, it's pretty good. Just the opposite of the way I thought it would go. Okay, I have three left. Let's do a lightning round, okay? Real quick, lightning round. Okay. Let's start now. Mario Golf Super Rush or Kirby Star Allies? Kirby. Kirby. Yep, Kirby sold more.

[01:34:48] 4.3 for Kirby, 2.4 for Mario Golf. Pikmin 4 or Clubhouse Games? What do you guys think? Clubhouse Games. Clubhouse Games. Clubhouse Games? You're right. Clubhouse Games sold 4.6. Pikmin 4 is 3.4. Last one. Splatoon 2 or Splatoon 3? What do you guys think? Splatoon 2. Splatoon 2 because of the head start, Steve? Splatoon 3. 2. You guys got to come to consensus? No, we got to agree. 2.

[01:35:19] Kevin was right. 2. 13.6 for 2. 11.9 for 3. So I think 3 will overtake it eventually as time goes on. But yeah, as of right now, 2 has sold more. I think 3 is still really selling though. Probably not. No, it doesn't have as long of a tale as 2 because 2 was like when people were buying a lot of switches and getting Splatoon 2 and stuff. You know, this is more like the people who bought it are going to buy it. But I still think it will overtake eventually.

[01:35:48] We can confidently say that more people are buying Splatoon 3 than Splatoon 2 in 2025. For sure. Absolutely. And they know now, thanks to Fine Time, that Splatoon 2 does not have that strong of a flavor. So maybe if that's what they're looking for, they will opt to buy Splatoon 3. I thought you were going to say they know from this show that Reef Slider is busted as hell. Which they're definitely going to fix in time for Splatoon 4 releasing this fall on Switch 2. They just kept buffing it the whole fucking life of the game.

[01:36:18] Yeah, what the hell was that? It's like they're buffing Reef Slider for the fifth time. Like, this is absurd. Someone up there is a Reef Slider fan, like for sure. Jesus Christ. Kevin's just like... Who's Kevin? Kevin was tweaking the code. I wish I would have, when we were doing our like, one of the many rounds of our Switch betting, I wish I would have like plugged in Splatoon 4 for 2026. Would you guys have put money on that? Yes.

[01:36:49] No doubt. I would, if you still want to ask, okay, if you want some money out of me next round, ask me that. I will put money on it. So, for sure. Even at like two to one odds? Well, yeah. I'll put good, yeah. I'll put good money on it. Shit. If you were to give me 2025, I'd probably put money on it, to be honest. I think that's happening soon. So, yeah. Anyway, okay, yeah. That's the show, guys. Thank you for joining me. Fun little game here. Right? We'll see you next time.

[01:37:17] Check the description of this podcast to find our links on social media. And see you next time. Bye. You've been listening to... Bye. Thank you.